| Curse? What
curse? Curses are superstitious hooey. Now ANAGRAMS, they're
a different story. Really. For those of you in need of a refresher,
anagrams are words that are formed by rearranging the letters of other
words. One of the most well-known pop-culture anagrams is "Mr. Mojo-Risin',"
which the late poet/musician Jim Morrison of The Doors penned in the song
"L.A. Woman," from the letters in his own name.
"All of life's wisdom can be found in anagrams. Anagrams never lie." Or so it is said. Someone said it, anyway. Here's a few more reasons why this has just GOT to be THE YEAR for the Boston Red Sox. No more "you-know-who" from you know where!! Besides, they don't have enough fingers for any more rings.
WHY THIS IS THE YEAR FOR THE OLD TOWNE TEAM In his second full year in the majors, he's whacking home runs like people in Maine are swatting mosquitoes, and he made Roger Clemens look silly in the Bronx earlier this season. Already young Trot Nixon is proving to be a real workhorse in right field: IRON, TNT, OX Out of nowhere, this 41-year old veteran made the team after being invited to Spring Training this year, then after inspiring all his teammates and tons of fans -- retired after only a few at-bats. Maybe that's because Gary Gaetti has reached A GRITTY AGE. But he truly set the tone for the Sox' strong start out of the gate. How about last year's surprise back-up catcher -cum- most promising young MLB catcher? Jason Varitek is AJAR, OK IN VEST. It may be that we'll get to the Big Dance VIA JASON TREK or maybe via a few of his treks, around the bases that is. Young pitcher Brian Rose began the year struggling, but the baseball gods inform us that he is A BORN SIRE.By season's end we may find ourselves remarking "BON E.R.A., SIR." They've been fighting off some injuries thus far, but the shortstop-3B combo of Garciaparra & Valentin is very telling. The wisdom says this duo will TRAP RIVAL IN A CARNAGE. These talented lads will take us all the way with 23 of their impressive teammates - A LARGE CARAVAN IN TRIP. If the worst happens, and Valentin is lost for the season, we have a nice surprise in our arsenal - the promising, young Wilton Veras, who most certainly will be NEWS TO RIVAL. Unofficial clubhouse coach and power-hitting veteran Mike Stanley IS MENTAL KEY to the Old Towne Team's success, sending a simple but potent message to his teammates: I STALK ENEMY. Platooning at first base and DH, and teaming up here for this double-anagram,the hidden but obvious wisdom on Stanley & Daubach is that this (1)SHY DUAL CAN ABET (2) A SALTY HUB DANCE! In picking up and hanging onto Gold-Glover Darren Lewis, Sox' GM Dan Duquette clearly pulled off a RARE SWINDLE. On the subject of swindles, how about that immensely TATER CLEVER Carl Everett? And how important will his role be in winning Boston a berth? When closer Rod Beck returns from rehab, we'll have solid BEDROCK in the bullpen. The trickery of knuckler Tim Wakefield always provides the team with A MID WEEK LIFT, since in the opponent's batter's box, FEW LIKE IT MAD and few can hit those dancing meatballs. What else can be said
about Pedro Martinez?
All I can do is deliver this direct order from the baseball gods:
REMAND PRIZE TO!
And what does the wisdom of anagrams reveal about Pedro's fellow starter and big brother, Ramon Martinez? TRIM ARM ON A ZEN! Finally - contrary to what Boston Globe columnist and author Dan Shaughnessy has written about anagrams and starting pitcher Pete Schourek, the real message here can only be this: POKE THE CURSE! But like I said, "What curse"? Curses are superstitious hooey. Go Sox!!! -yf
|
(Speaking
of fingers and the Bronx Bombers...) Sox' great and 2000 Baseball Hall
of Fame inductee Carlton Fisk gestures toward the Yankee's dugout before
tossing out the first pitch in Game 4 of the 1999 A.L.C.S. (AP photo)
I think he spoke for a lot of people that day.