THE
STAR
WARS
SAGA:
FOR THE RECORD
This
is just a little tally of the movies' various recurring themes, trends,
and the like. Obsessive maybe, but I try to keep as far away from diehard
Trekkie-ness as I possibly can.
It
can be interesting to see when the mixed bag that is the Phantom Menace
breaks the mold.
"I have a bad feeling about
this..."
The infamous
joke phrase that's become de rigueur -- who utters it, and bad thing that
ensues:
-
ANH: Luke as they approach the Death
Star. They're taken aboard and barely escape
-
ANH: Han inside the garbage room. The
walls close in, but the droids save the day and they barely escape
-
ESB: Leia inside the "cave." The "cave"
turns out to be the slug and they barely escape
-
ROTJ: 3PO inside Jabba's palace. The
gang's rescue plans run amok and they barely escape
-
ROTJ: Han when the Ewok village as
dinner. A resourceful Luke changes the Ewoks' minds and they barely escape
-
TPM: Obi-Wan inside the Trade Federation
control ship. The Fed tries to kill the Jedi and they barely escape, though
not as barely as those other times (granted, the "bad feeling" Obi-Wan
refers to is probably everything that ensues in the entire Star Wars saga
from thereon)
-
AOTC: Anakin inside the Geonosian arena.
Three big, scary monsters are unleashed and with the aid of a ton of Jedi
and clones, they barely escape
-
Ep. III: Yoda, inverted as always.
Please, George?
The Beginning
How each film
starts out after the opening crawl:
-
ANH: Pan down to the space above Tatooine,
Rebel frigate flying in from the right of the screen, followed by the famously
lengthy reveal of the Imperial Star Destroyer
-
ESB: Pan down to a fleet of Star Destroyers.
One spits out probe droid pods, one of which flies out to Hoth
-
ROTJ: Pan down to a fleet of Star Destroyers
and the "incomplete" Death Star II
-
TPM: Pan down to a Republic ship flying
on-screen and toward Trade Fed control ships hovering above Naboo
-
AOTC: Pan up to a Republic (Naboo)
ship and escort fighters, which then flip "upside down" as they approach
Coruscant
And in the End...
The final scenes
in each film:
-
ANH: Award ceremony, characters walk
up steps. Our Heroes face "the fourth wall"
-
ESB: Reverse shot of Luke, Leia, and
the droids looking out into space on board the Rebel medical ship
-
ROTJ: Partyin' Ewok-style. Our Heroes
break "the fourth wall" in a possibly cheesy group photo kind of setup
-
TPM: Parade and Ball-of-Peace-thing
ceremony, characters walk up steps. Our Heroes break "the fourth wall."
Boss Nass's "Peace" is the only time any dialogue is used in a final scene
-
AOTC: Reverse shot of Anakin, Padme,
and the droids looking out to the horizon on Naboo. Interestingly, "War"
comes quite close to being the last word said in the film, via Yoda
-
Ep. III: The mood would be radically
different, but it'll be interesting if it somehow parallels ROTJ
'Splosions!
How each movie
literally starts with a bang:
-
ANH: Imperials overtake the Rebel blockade
runner and blow the door open to get in.
-
ESB: A small one, but a probe droid
pod crashes onto Hoth.
-
ROTJ: None. First one doesn't really
occur until the sail barge goes kaboom.
-
TPM: A few minutes into things, the
Trade Fed decides to blow up the Republic cruiser. The co-pilot fails to
raise the shields in time, opting instead to verbally tell the pilot they're
about to get toasted..
-
AOTC: Amidala's ship arrives on Coruscant,
and blows up by an outside hand soon after.
Who's Saving Who?
Botched rescues:
-
ANH: The attempted rescue of Leia in
the Death Star (Luke's idea)
-
ESB: Han, Leia, and company's, at Cloud
City (Luke's idea)
-
ROTJ: Han's (and later Leia's and Chewie's),
at Jabba's palace (Luke's idea)
-
TPM: None (!)
-
AOTC: Obi-Wan's, on Geonosis (Anakin
wanted to but Padme brings him along. Keep in mind these two end up being
Luke's parents)
He Gets by with a Little Too
Much Help from His Friends
Luke, the original
trilogy's main hero finds himself being saved by:
-
ANH: Obi-Wan, after he's attacked by
Tusken Raiders (and his speeder is cleaned out... very uncool)
-
ANH: Ol' Ben again, when he's bullied
by two cantina thugs.
-
ANH: The droids, when the gang comes
dangerously close to getting "a whole lot thinner" in the trash compactor
(granted it was more Leia's fault, though her getting them into that situation
was more Luke's fault)
-
ANH: Han, preventing death by Luke's
old man in the Death Star trench
-
ESB: Han, preventing death by Old Man
Winter on Hoth
-
ESB: Yoda, when his X-Wing slides deeper
into the swamp (not life-saving, but pretty big)
-
ESB: Leia, after a failed suicide leap
at Cloud City
-
ROTJ: Vader/Anakin, from Palpy's lightning.
Luke proves himself an honest-to-goodness Jedi after only needing to be
saved once in an entire movie
"If I Fell..."
Lightsaber duels
in or near bottomless pits:
-
ANH: Ben and Vader near that Death
Star personnel transport lift-type thing. It doesn't affect the duelists,
but a few stormtroopers fall down it later on
-
ESB: Luke and Vader in the heart of
Cloud City. Luke falls down it... mostly
-
ROTJ: Luke and Vader next to that reactor
shaft in the second Death Star. Palpy falls into it
-
TPM: Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Maul in
Naboo's generator room, where Obi-Wan falls but lands on a catwalk), and
later on near that... pit (waste disposal?). Maul falls into it... in two
-
AOTC: None in the arena, and none in
the hangar as far as I can tell. A Jedi does plummet from the balcony thanks
to Jango.
-
Not really a duel, but Luke does some sabering
near the Sarlaac pit in ROTJ, which a few baddies fall into
Out on a Limb
Disembodied extremities
and their owners, and who disembodied said extremities:
-
ANH: 3PO and his arm, by falling during
the Tusken raid
-
ANH: "Walrus Man" and his arm, by Obi-Wan
-
ESB: The Wampa and his arm, by Luke
-
ESB: Luke and his hand, by Vader
-
ESB: 3PO and his leg, by incomplete
repairs from Chewie and R2
-
ROTJ: Vader and his hand, by Luke
-
TPM: Various battle droid parts, by
the Jedi, if anything. Maybe the space frog's head via Jabba
-
AOTC: Three Tusken Raiders and their
heads, by Anakin
-
AOTC: 3PO and his head, in the battle
droid production line (he promptly gets switched around with another droid
head and body)
-
AOTC: The crab/mantis-type thing in
the arena battle and its feet, by Jango or Obi-Wan?
-
AOTC: Jango and his head, permanently,
by a surprised Mace
-
AOTC: Anakin and his forearm, by Dooku
-
A conceptual one, but in ANH: Chewie
and the arms of a victorious holochess opponent
The Third Person
Luke, and the
Jedi who like to mess around with his mind:
-
ANH: Luke first meets up with Ben,
who refers to "Obi-Wan" in the third person ("Oh, he's not dead... not
yet"), before revealing that he himself is Obi-Wan.
-
ESB: That funny li'l green guy on Dagobah
promises to take Luke to "Yoda" ("Soon you will be with him"), long before
it's revealed that he himself is Yoda
ESB: Darth Vader tells Luke that
Ben never told him what happened to his father. Well, 'turns out it's him
"I Got 'Im! I GOT 'Im!"
Stormtroopers
shoot and score when they actually hit these main characters with their
guns:
-
ANH: The Rebel troops in the opening
scenes
-
ANH: Princess Leia after giving R2
her message (set on stun)
-
ROTJ: Leia at the shield generator
on Endor (only grazed)
-
ROTJ: R2 at the shield generator
"Meanwhile..."
Number of climactic
battles in...
-
ANH: 1 (Death Star attack)
-
ESB: 2 (escape of Leia, Chewie, et
al; Luke/Vader duel)
-
ROTJ: 3 (Endor ground battle, Death
Star attack, Luke/Vader duel)
-
TPM: 4 (Gungan-Federation ground battle,
Naboo's viceroy pursuit, control ship attack, Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan/Maul duel)
-
AOTC: 2 (Arena/post-arena battle, followed
by Jedi duels concurrent with the Republic/Separatist battle)
"Somewhere on the outer rim
there are slaves starving"
You never see
them use the restrooms, but they sure do eat a lot:
-
ANH: Luke barely touches the dinner
poor ol' Aunt Beru makes for him. He gulps the blue milk however
-
ANH: Luke has "one of those" in the
cantina, but I guess a lot of patrons are consuming something here, aren't
they?
-
ESB: The Wampa gets to snack on a previous
catch, thanks to the Special Edition
-
ESB: Luke and his dinner after his
Dagobah crash landing... a Twix bar, if you ask me
-
ESB: Luke and Yoda dine on homemade
rootleaf stew. Hot!
-
ESB: The space slug loses his lunch
as the Falcon makes a narrow escape
-
ESB: Vader and crew are honored when
Han, Leia, and Chewie join them for some non-existent refreshments
-
ROTJ: Jabba chows down on them space
frogs
-
ROTJ: The Rancor bites into a Gamorrean
Guard like an Easter chocolate bunny
-
ROTJ: The Sarlaac Pit.. are you kidding
me? It's a veritable feast!
-
ROTJ: Chewie thinks with his stomach
when he falls for the ol' Ewok meat trap routine
-
ROTJ: Leia offers Wicket some Rebel
Rations. "Goonda," says the Ewok
-
ROTJ: Ewoks try to serve Our Heroes,
but guest of honor 3PO isn't hungry
-
TPM: Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan enjoy a tasty
beverage, courtesy those swell Trade Fed guys
-
TPM: Sebulba and friends wolf down
on Tatooine market fare. Jar Jar tries to get himself a piece, but lacks
the funds
-
TPM: The gang heads over to Ani's for
mom's home-cookin'
-
AOTC: Obi-Wan has a drink at the Coruscant
bar after sending Ani to do all the hard work
-
AOTC: Anakin and Padme on the space
bus/liner to Naboo
-
AOTC: Ditto in a Naboo palace(?) with
the floatin' piece of fruit
-
AOTC: Beru brings in some drinks for
everyone (not blue milk), but no one's thirsty
-
AOTC: Padme brings in some food and
a cup of blue milk for Ani after he comes back from finding his mom, but
he's still not in the mood
"Thanks for watching, and drive
safely"
A curse? George
and the series' male leads have all been in vehicular accidents:
-
Lucas suffered a near-fatal car crash shortly
before high school graduation, which he survived because he didn't wear
his seat belt. He ended up receiving his diploma while recovering in the
hospital.
-
Mark Hamill crashed his car on a highway while
driving to reshoots for ANH. There's a lot of different stories about this
one, from the extent of his injuries, to whether the wampa attack scene
was specifically written to explain his appearance (Hamill has denied it
in interviews, which I can believe since he appears onscreen before the
attack anyway).
-
Harrison Ford crashed his car into a pole
in his early 20s, leaving the trademark scar on his chin (supposedly he
couldn't afford to have it surgically covered up). While this was obviously
before doing Star Wars, he did crash his helicopter in October 1999,
while practicing a maneuver with an instructor.
-
Liam Neeson was thrown from his Harley in
the summer of 2000 while trying to avoid a deer on a New York road, resulting
in a broken pelvis among other injuries. Presumably he's made a full recovery
since then.
-
Ewan McGregor crashed a borrowed Honda motorcycle
in Scotland in April of 1999, a test drive gone bad due to spilled diesel
on the street. He walked away with minor bruises. McGregor actually went
through another mishap in June of 2000, again on a borrowed motorbike,
again walking away unscathed. This time he eventually wound up finding
his own bike stolen hours later.
-
Even Temuera Morrison joined the list, crashing
his Harley while riding around in New Zealand in early January of
'04, leaving a leg broken in two places.
-
As far as I can tell, Billy Dee Williams has
never been in an accident (presumably he knows when to keep the keys, and
when to enjoy the Colt 45), and Hayden Christensen, well, he's got plenty
of years ahead of him.
|