The Creation of the Horse
In the beginning the Great Engineering Spirit created RED HORSE, Air Force
Combat Engineering Squadrons....
And the HORSE was without form, and void, and uncertainty was cast upon the face
of the Air Staff Engineers and the Great Spirit pondered how to move them across
the face of the waters to places where others waged war and troubled all the
lands...
And the Great Spirit said, "let them be rapidly deployable", and they were
rapidly deployable. And the Great Spirit
called the rapidly deployable RED HORSE, and the stationary he called Base Civil
Engineering.
And the Great Spirit said, "let them build and construct BIG jobs in the midst
of bombs and bullets and let them move dirt and rocks and stuff and build
runways and airfields for the Ops Weenies to land their flying machines on"...
And the Great Spirit provided equipment doers and big noisy mechanical gizmos to
do the work; and it was so...
And the Great Spirit saw the need for board puttogetherers to construct enormous
symbols of the HORSE to be revered by all...
And the Great Spirit called this gaggle of gearjammers, mudmovers, and
nailbenders; Operations...
And the Great Spirit said, "let RED HORSE be gathered together into one place,
and let it be run by a brash, boisterous colonel"; and it was so...
And the Great Spirit called the equipment doers Airfields; and the board
puttogetherers, plunger toters, and lightning grabbers he called Cantonments;
and the Great Spirit saw that it was good...
And the Great Spirit said, "let there be bulldozers, dump trucks, scrapers, and
deuce and a halves to move the doers and run into and over things upon the
earth"; and it was so...
And the Great Spirit brought forth hordes of equipment fixers, some special,
some general, some neither special nor general, but all bearing big wrenches and
hammers to fix the doers vehicles; and the Great Spirit saw it was good...
And the Great Spirit called the armada of tool box toters; vehicle maintenance....
And the Great Spirit said, "let there be creative thinkers and good drawers to
sort out vague requirements into jobs for the doers and let them be called
"Engineering."
And let them for once finish before the equipment doers start
building; and it was so...
And the Great Spirit made two great engineers, the greater engineer to command
the squadron, play "Bugga Bugga", and go TDY, and the lesser to burn brain cells
creating wondrous checklist ideas to confuse the doers, drawers and all who gaze upon them...
And the Great Spirit set them at desks to keep their uniforms clean and belch
forth-nebulous guidance to the doers on construction stuff...
And to rule over the work and accept only good "training value" jobs that can be
left undone, so as not to show up the local BCE; and the Spirit saw it was good...
And the doers and drawers bring forth swarms of projects needing an abundance of difficult to acquire building materials, parts and doofers...
And the Great Spirit created a menagerie of box kickers called Logistics to
steal parts from anyone to give to the doers to build stuff to impress the Ops
Weenies; and the Spirit saw it was good...
And the Great Spirit blessed them saying, "Be happy in your work and stop rewarehousing and find some materials to keep the doers occupied for a change"...
And the Great Spirit brought forth-calculating combat paper pushers to keep the doers doing, and to keep the dishonest honest...
And the Spirit called these paper pushers many names (although not the same as the doers), He called them, Personnel, Information Management, Finance, Training,
and of course the Ops Center; and this was indeed very good...
And the Great Spirit said, "Let the HORSE be self-sufficient in the field and bring forth burger flippers armed with spoons and spatulas to feed the doers"; and he call this kitchen crew Food Services or MWRS; and it was so...
And the Great Spirit made the burger flippers wash their hands and use field kitchens to concoct their combat cuisine’s and the Spirit made them eat their own meals instead of MRE’s and it was good...
And the Great Spirit said, "Let us make RED HORSE invincible and let them have complete uncontrolled domain by being tenant units at bases not working for Wing Commanders and other Ops Weenies...
So the Great Spirit made RED HORSE work for a numbered Air Force Ops Weenie and thus let them skip the Wing Commanders Staff meetings and make up their own rules....
And the great Spirit blessed them and said to them, "Be tenacious but tactful,
moveth your mouth with great caution because numbered Air Force Ops weenies work
for High Roller Majcom Weenies"...
And the Great Spirit said, "Behold, I have given you a license to steal and to
discard all of the legalities and rules that BCE’s must follow, this unto itself
shall make you more responsive and show up the local BCE’s and impress the hell
out of the Ops Weenies"...
And the Great Spirit saw everything that he had made, and behold it was very
good...
Thus RED HORSE was finished, and the Great Spirit ended his work which he had
made; and he rested using a sacred down day obtained from all his work which he
made without a single reportable mishap....
And the Great Spirit blessed the down day, and sanctified it; because it surely
will be the last one the HORSE will ever get!
And the great Spirit saw that it was good; and the Great
Spirit divided the rapidly deployable from the stationary.
And then there was the HORSE and there was the BCE, and there was
no comparison...
