A Journal of Sorts
"tossed into my mind, stirring the calm you splash me with beauty and pull me down you come from out of nowhere my glance turns to a stare obsession rules me - I'm yours from the start I know you see me - our eyes interlock you come from out of nowhere my glance turns to a stare one minute here and one minute there don't know if I'll laugh or cry one minute here and one minute there and then you wave good-bye..." ~ Faith No More ~ the feeling, deeper than sunset, comes washing over me like a sumnami sweeps across an island... for a moment that feels like eternity, I am submerged in surging energy that presses the air from my lungs, I can not breath... from afar, it appears I am swallowed, buried, gone... and then, with silent power the wave slowly recedes and I am there, as if reborn... the same, yet nothing is the same... cleansed... stipped naked... raw... tingling, yet still and comforted and at peace with the universe... this is the feeling I find sometimes inside when I find someone who inspires me... maybe it's falling in love... maybe it can not truly be described in words... startled out of slumber rising from the dead running so far behind thinking hurts my head still there is excitement maybe there is hope someone grabbing on to the end of the rope can I really believe that I am not alone? can I really trust there is someone out there? can I really give you everything and not find it thrown back to hurt me? can I really believe you are there and will not desert me? there is only one thing I can say for sure I don't know what to believe anymore stumbling through the night reason left behind starring in my own sky opening my mind believing in the feeling while becoming aware what I can not touch is not here can I really believe that I am not alone? can I really trust there is someone out there? can I really give you everything and not find you share? can I really believe you are there and care? there is only one thing I can say for sure I don't know what to believe anymore J |
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