A Journal of Sorts
"someone should have helped her through the day someone like the moon" ~ Pulp ~ work... sleep... life... repeat... phew... alas, will anybody every become part of it and help make it more?... I can (and have many times throughout this life) filled my time with interesting people and worthwhile activities and had little or no time for any sort of wallowing in the loneliness that life seems made of... but without an intimate partner sharing everything, a soulmate sharing all the secrets and magic of unconditional love and unconditional trust, the busiest life is empty at the center where it matters most... at least that's how it feels for me today... I wonder how it feels for you... could we be each others moon reflecting the light in our souls representing all the secrets that make us worthwhile could we be each others moon reflecting the light in our hearts representing all the passion that controls our smile will you represent all you see in me will you genuflect all you want to be will you compromise make the perfect fit so we'll be together all of it could we be each others moon reflecting the light in our minds representing all the dreams that make us mean something could we be each others moon reflecting the light in our eyes representing all the visions that make us want to sing will you represent all you see in me will you genuflect all you want to be will you collaborate make the perfect rhyme so we'll be together all the time could we be each others moon reflecting the light no one can see representing all the unknown in the universal ring could we be each others moon reflecting the light in our core representing all the power that controls everything will you represent all you see in me will you genuflect all you want to be will you harmonize make the perfect sound so we'll be together all around I guess I should consider editing through the journals one of these days and pulling out the rhymes so they might get some more exposure since less people ramble through these journals to find all the rhymes and more people seek out and find the rhymes in other parts of the garden cuz they are presented a little more like poetry and can be viewed as less personal... maybe... and why do I want exposure?... wow, what a can that question can open J ok, let's go exploring... ego wants attention cuz ego is basically hollow and insecure as hell and wants relatively constant stroking to be able to smile... that's why I don't give ego much control (as long as I can help it)... ego is like a drug, an amazingly powerful drug... a wonderful experience sometimes, but dangerous... libbo wants attention cuz libbo is relatively insatiable and has never been fully satisfied in this life (though we've come close a few times... and more times in dreams)... but we're still just scratching (or stroking) the surface... child wants attention cuz child never had a mommy or daddy or brother or sister and still has no known biological bonds and child always dreamed of having a mommy (at least) and daddy and family that wrapped each other up in unconditional love and trust and the security of knowing they'd always be there as long as they lived... alas, a little for child's dream late I guess... the creative aspects (they of many names) want attention for a lot of reasons... to share the collaborative creativity that is a big part of being creative... to get feedback and input on the creativity I have in me and to be inspired to find more... and maybe even to do something mre commercial with creativity if the opportunities appear... it might be a little late in the game to be a front singer for a band, but there's still more musical energy and words in me than anybody I've ever met so far and I wish I'd meet some people who'd run me into the ground one day before this body dies... my mind wants attention cuz that proves I am here... two points make a line and lines are visible, points are concepts... sharing concepts, sharing life, gives tangible evidence that we exist... and more, the entity I know as me is still evolving and developing and growing and learning comes through exploring the environment and sharing with others is a large part of that exploration... my heart wants attention cuz it exists to love and be loved and trust and be trusted unconditionally... there's got to be others in this world who can actualize this sort of sharing and without it, my heart dreams and floats on balloons of hope over pits of despair and deeply painful loneliness... I had to ask, huh? J |
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American Psycho
Aerosmith, Doors Hearts In Atlantis by Stephen King Subway chicken sandwich, q-pounder w/cheese activities asst weird stuff: one two tree kirk beef news |
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