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Why Men
Are
Just Happier People
Your
last name stays put.
The garage
is all yours.
Wedding
plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate
is just another snack.
You
can be president.
You
can never be pregnant.
You
can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can
wear NO T-shirt to a water park.
Car
mechanics tell you the truth.
The
world is your urinal.
You
never have to drive to another gas station
restroom because this one is just too icky.
You
don't have to stop and think of which
way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work,
more pay.
Wrinkles
add character.
Wedding
dress -- $5000. Tux rental -- $150.
New
shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
The
occasional well-rendered belch is
practically expected.
People
never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
Guy Movies are more fun!
One
mood - all the time.
Your
underwear is $8.95 for three-pack.
If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she
can still be your friend.
A
five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You
can open all your own jars.
You
get extra credit for the slightest act
of thoughtfulness.
You
know stuff about tanks.
Three
pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You
almost never have strap problems in
public.
You
are unable to see wrinkles in your
clothes.
Everything
on your face stays its original
color.
The
same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe
decades.
You
only have to shave your face and neck.
You
can play with toys all your life.
Your belly
usually hides your big hips
One
wallet and one pair of shoes one color
for all seasons.
You
can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You
can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
You have
freedom of choice concerning
growing a mustache.
You
can do Christmas shopping for 25
relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No
wonder men are happier.
50
Best Guy Movies Of All Time
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Editing,
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