Episode Report Cards

Ascent

Overall grade A+++
Superb! I laughed! I cried! I actually stopped eating! Anytime a TV show is good enough to accomplish THAT feat you get automatic high marks!

Johnny A
You SUCK for cheating on Walt but you really fell on the sword this weak. You’re redeemed. It’ll be a long time coming for Sarah, but you’ve officially made up for the abject betrayal of Walt. Congratulations. (What?? Look, the dude faced down DEATH for Walt! He’s redeemed!!!)

Bruce B
You got trounced by a five year old but it’s good to have you back, buddy!

Dana A
I’ve said it before but anytime Dana is reduced to a couple lines I’m a happy guy! Is Kristen Dalton even drawing a salary anymore? I hope she’s not getting paid per minute of screen time because if that's the case she's made $1.69 so far this year.

Sarah B
Thanks for solving the sticky button problem, though Half N Half would HAVE to improve the taste of nasty coin op soup! But I noticed in that scene you weren’t even showing your pregnancy yet but you’re already making moon eyes at Walt. Bad Sarah! But still, she turned the thermostat up a notch towards Johnny so it’s all good.

Purdy C
He was there.

Walt A
You SUCK for beating up Johnny but fortunately it was a dream butt kicking. Otherwise you rocked. Especially when you stuck it to Old Man Death.

Li'l Johnny A+
He smiled! He acknowledged Johnny’s presence! Maybe, JUST MAYBE, he can grow on me. Keep it up, crumbsnatcher. (the child actor was brilliant in this ep. I love his timing on the Bond marathon joke. I’m guessing he’s been working with an acting coach and that is starting to pay dividends)

Snotty Death F
You’re “oh fer two” Scythe Boy! Sometimes my individual derisive scorn isn’t enough, so allow me to bring in my three dogs to chime in with a rendition of “LOOOOOUUU-SER”!!! Anytime you want another spanking, come on back and mess with Johnny again.

90 Pound Weakling Orderly F
You can’t separate the hands of two comatose men????? It’s time to put the golf club down and pick up a barbell, Twinky! (This was the only flaw in an otherwise perfect ep. They would have summoned six beefy orderlies if necessary to separate those hands before hitting the men with the juice paddles.)

Moral of the Ep:
“Boink your friends’ wives so you can have that revelation in your hip pocket in case you ever need to tick them off to save their lives!”

Feedback

SpiritFriend
Cool. Thanks for the Report Card.

JohnnysGirl2
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

MOPP_Level_4
One could become addicted to this show REAL fast! OOPS! Already there!

justmeagain
Shadowdead,
Thanks, I needed that. ROTFLMAO
MOPP_Level_4,
You can add me to the list of DZA (Dead Zone Anonymous).
I'm totally Zoned and I like it, I like it.

Califzonewoman
And the Report Card's Report Card? A++ We laughed, we cried, we ROFL! But we DIDN'T stop eating! THAT would take a true miracle!
Keep up the good work, ShadowDead! You seem to speak for the majority here.

jerikor
Yup, you speak true! I laughed so hard I fell out of my chair, but cried when Johnny's heart stopped. The drama was so great and so were the actors. Ah, wonderful show.

jphtdz
I happen to think that separating the two of them was a supernatural portion of the episode, and not to be taken as a weakling's attempt to pull them apart. The fight for life was extreme, as Death said, Johnny was fighting in more than the physical realm for Walt's life.

Back to Dead Zone Central

-