Weekly World News...sigh...my favorite educational literature. Years back told us science was crossing animals with fruit trees. The trees could then walk... bear fruit in the South during winter then migrate north to bear fruit in summer. I haven't seen any trees walking by yet...will report to you immediatly upon first sighting. Maybe they'll put a box of apples on my porch. Stand by...

Remember this, my dear, the next time you flirt with another man in front of your husband. Shrinks tell us it's good for your husband...a little is. Sharpens his senses...increases blood pressure and makes him more alert. Too much flirting, however, isn't good for anyone. Especially you.

Mountain climbing is a sport that many people enjoy, I know. Just don't know why. But, if I owned a mountain they would have to buy rescue insurance before climbing it. Let them pay the millions of dollars that taxpayers, yearly, have to pay to rescue them when something goes wrong with their dangerous play.

Unpopular stance, huh? Maybe with mountain climbers...not with the other taxpayers.

We still have the young orange tom cat mentioned earlier (writing since deleted) Josef Jerome "mouse breath". He no longer brings mice to plop at our feet...must have run out of them. Recently he tried to attack a squirrel...got beat up. Now, around squirrels,he walks very respectfully.

GLOBAL WARMING...it's real, folks. Polar caps will be melted in another ten million years. Tomorrow I'm going to go buy a rowboat. Best be ready.

When will the State of Washington stop looking for the Indian Chief who was lost during the bad winter of 1930 in Snoqualmie Pass? Chief Rolling Rock was his name. Trying to explore a foot path over the Cascade Mountains to Seattle... lost in a snow storm. There still are signs in the pass..."Watch For Rolling Rock".

8/29/02

BANANAS. Mosquitoes are most attracted to someone who has just eaten a banana. O K ... next backyard barbacue mix your wife a banana daquiri... she'll be flattered by the attention. Then have her sit over at the far edge of the patio. She'll never know.

How many of you men were in the U. S. Marines? I wasn't...but... I know this: The first U. S. Marines wore high leather collars to protect their necks from swords. Hence the name "Leathernecks". Possibly I should get such a collar to sleep in after The Mt. Baker Lady reads my suggestion for daquiri's.

Cheer up...we can't always have a good day. Sometimes you're the dog... sometimes the hydrant. As a matter of fact it's my sole purpose in life to serve as a warning to others. It's working so far.

What are you going to do to memorialize Sept. 11? This date should become a day of national recognition...akin to Memorial Day. We'll fly our flag (on a 40 foot mast) at half mast...say a prayer for those innocents so murdered... and plant a tree in our local park. What else? Any suggestions?

Many people don't realize this: Although the postage on your first class letter is .37 cents for the first ounce, it's only .23 cents for each ounce over the first one. Nit picking or penny pinching, perhaps, but you can purchase the lower priced stamps to add to your .37 cent one for over one ounce letters. Usually, the weight of four 8X11 sheets of paper plus the envelope equal one ounce. Add one ounce for every four additional sheets and you'll be O K.

Not too late to mention...Smokey The Bear turned Fifty Seven in August this year (2002). He was just a "Cub" of seven years old back when I was a know-it-all Senior in high school. When I became a Cub I had to be nine years old. Work on that one...there's an answer in there somewhere.