THERE'S ALWAYS HOPE... (I HOPE...) THERE'S ALWAYS HOPE... (I HOPE...) THERE'S ALWAYS HOPE... (I HOPE...) THERE'S ALWAYS HOPE...
LETTERS TO STRANGERS
...WORDS I HAVE POSTED PUBLICALLY IN VARIOUS PLACES IN RESPONSE TO OTHERS WORDS...


...a friend is a stranger waiting to be met...

Lonely Times Ahead

August 18, 1998

>My daughter is going back to college this weekend.
>My son is 18 and even though his address is the same as mine...
>I never see him he graduates high school this year,
>then he will be off to college also.
>I have been divorced for many years now. I guess I had come
to depend on my kids for the bulk of company that I kept.
>Now the chicks are leaving the nest at too high a rate of speed
>for me....I look at my life and wonder what will happen when
>I truly am..."all by myself"
>its scary really.
>I have been thinking a lot about moving closer to some family...
>down in Ft. Myers Florida....beautiful down there....and
>I love the sun...cold damp winters are starting to depress me.
>Every once in a while I wonder....where did the time go?
>Just random thoughts....I am feeling lonlier by the minute.

*hug*... it happened so suddenly for me... one day I was parent, full time at home taking care of 4 kids and the dog and the living space and the school and the activities and so on... next day I was not allowed to see any of them... we were all devastated, so unprepared... and yet, I cried the night I had to leave (supposely for just one day) because I sensed it might be a long time before I returned, if I returned...

and if I took that "sense" seriously, I'd have made sure the last moments I spent there with my family were the best moments... not just passing time and taking for granted or even drifting away...

please treasure the time you've had and the time you still have... and even more, actively appreciate the time you have left to prepare for their leaving... let the last months or years together be the best memories and closest bonding and highest respect and deepest love you can achieve...

for the chance to do it over will not come again...

honest love, ric

"In the attics of my life
full of cloudy dreams unreal
full of tastes no tongue can know
and lights no eyes can see
  when there was no ear to hear...
  you sang to me."

~ Grateful Dead ~

random thoughts... I'll be back in Florida, most likely, before long... unless some miracle happens and I find a way to be with my family again...

~ UPDATE Summer 1999: this dear person was wise enough to look the fear of lonely times ahead right in the eye and prepare for the changes... and now she's balancing a job she enjoys with an offline social and dating life that keeps her too busy to sit at her computer much... and though I miss her dearly cuz she's an offline friend too though we live in different cities, I am happy cuz she inspires me and I am very proud of her...

just thought you'd like to know there really is hope J

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