friends
K wrote...
>I tried studying, I really did. I just can't get into it. I keep
>thinking about R. We used to be friends, not too long ago. And
>now everytime I talk to him. he pushes me away. I can't understand
>why. I wonder if I pushed him too hard, or if he just got bored with
>me. Or is it a phase ofdepression? He sits at his computer in his
>world, because there he can't touch anybody, and nobody can touch him.
>It upsets me to see him like that. I tell him a story to cheer him up,
>and he just listens, emotionless. He'll talk to me online, but not in
>real life. It's as if I'm no longer a pert of his world. I'm like one
>of the toys he buys, plays with for five or six days, and gets bored
>with. It leaves me with a very sick feeling in my stomach. But at the
>same time I just don't know what to do with him. I don't want him to be
>depressed all the time. I care about him. The thought of life without
>him scares me.
>
> -K.
>
>--
>"And what happens if you fall out of that groove?"
>"Oh, well then I'm in trouble."
try not to imagine why he is doing it, that leaves too much room for thiking it's your fault... you care, you know this... you are trying, you know this... it is not your fault if you give a gift and the receiver is not ready to receive at the moment you give it... have faith that the R you know is there and the gift of your time and caring is worth a lot... it just may take time for you to receive feedback about how much it's worth... stay positive and use the solitary time to focus on building you as you planned :)
newsbee
when I hear you call me friend
I wonder what you mean
do I envision images
your eyes have never seen?
do you picture a process
that takes time and great care?
or do you just accept the word
and assume we'll be there?
isn't it presumptious?
or am I being rude?
I just want to know you
don't mean to be crude
blunt is my approach here
cuz truth is what I seek
so I ask for the meaning
of the words you speak
when I hear you call me love
I wonder what you feel
is it the same emotion
that I want to make real?
we create our illusions
but what do we really share?
and what do we take for granted?
can we make ourselves clear?
I don't mean to offend you
or question your intentions
it's just the way I see things
words are mental inventions
and I want to know deeper
what you mean and who you are
so please excuse my questions
if they seem to go too far
this rhyme will be continued
as long as we still share
because if I stop asking
then I no longer care
I hope you understand me
and still want to know more
cuz sharing is infinite
and what I am here for
I will respect your choices
if you close your door
and if you mind me knocking
I will knock just once more
to tell you that you're welcome
to come out anytime
and share and care and be here
in this eternal rhyme
giving asks for nothing
but the giving...
... a friend is a stranger waiting to be met ... a friend is a stranger wanting to be met ... a friend is a stranger willing to be met ...
