You have to help me! Aliens have possessed my children. They don't even speak English anymore. "Pika, Pika, Pikachu, Pika, Pika…" my kids say to me when I just ask them what they would like for breakfast. Have your children become victims of the Pokémon Plague that is sweeping the world?

Reminiscent of the classic Body Snatchers movie, my children have changed overnight. The other day, as I unsuspectingly walked upstairs, I was ambushed with the cries: "Team Rocket!" My four-year-old son and ten-year-old daughter were unrecognizable. They were wearing pants on their heads and various other odd items. When I called their names, they spoke in that unknown language. What is a mother to do? Who are these people masquerading as my children and living in my house? It's not just my kids-suddenly THEY ARE EVERYWHERE. Wherever children meet, they greet each other in their code and excitedly trade cards with pictures of strange little creatures on them. (There seems to be some value associated with them, based on how rare they are.)

I caught a glimpse of the TV show the other day-very weird. A Japanese import, the animation is done in anime, a stiff and stylized form using vivid colors and exaggerated expressions. Now, the story- or as I have been able to decipher-is that a boy named Ash and his friends are trying to catch strange little creatures (pocket monsters, a.k.a. "Pokémon"). Their competition comes from the Team Rocket, a very dark and egocentric boy and girl duo and their companion, a maniacal cat-creature, called "Meowth."

There are 151 Pokémon. Some look cute, and others could co-star in a horror movie. Pickachu seems to be the star of the little critters. He's a small yellow alien with button eyes and pink cheeks. Evidently, the Pokémon mutate or "evolve" through fighting each other. (I'm a little confused about this part.) They feature bizarre names like Koffing, Charizard, Venusaur, Charmander and Butterfree. (You've probably heard these names bandied around your house and wondered if they were foreign exchange students at your kids' school…)

I always worry about the influences of TV, so when I caught wind of this obsession in my home, I made myself watch one of the shows. (If it had been used as a torture technique, I would have shamelessly given away secrets to the enemy.) I did not see any overt violence, although there are battle scenes between the aliens. They have thunderbolts and such coming from their tails. I thought it looked fairly innocuous, albeit ridiculous. I was concerned the next day, however, when my little boy got carried away while in "character" and laid some feisty kicks on his sister…

The TV show is reported to be the leading syndicated show in the United States. Ever since the horror stories circulated about Power Rangers shows inciting young children to be aggressive, parents worry about the effects of TV children's programming. Indeed, one Pokémon broadcast was canceled after flashing images were blamed for mass convulsions and nausea among several hundred Japanese viewers(!). This appears to have been a fluke, and I am sure it will be protected against in the future.

Frankly, I just don't get it, but then a mom in her late '30s is not exactly the target audience the Hasbro Company is aiming for. In fact, they have identified and neatly captured a very broad market, made up of children (boys and girls equally), ages four to early teens.

Shrewdly recognizing the multimedia marketing and merchandising potential of this fad, Hasbro is raking it in. There are the trading cards, videos, Nintendo games, stuffed toys, posters-you name it. I even saw a children's birthday catalog that promoted the "Pokémon birthday party!"

Agggghhh! Of course, Hasbro is laughing all the way to the bank. Any despairing or disparaging comments a frazzled mother might make won't hurt their feelings! Since it was imported, more than 2.4 million Pokémon Gameboy cartridges have been sold in the United States.

My children play-act it constantly, speak the "language" and are learning the intricacies of the card trading game. My daughter was completely sucked into it. She sneaked to school with her entire saved allowance of $14 and handed it over to a classmate in exchange for a few cards.

I had to get the teacher to intervene on that one…we pleaded "temporary insanity."

Are you as dismayed as I am by this craze? Some parents want their real children to come back and are sick of hearing about it; others think it's a fun and harmless pastime-even a positive socializing opportunity. Some moms like the show's ability to spark their children's imagination, fueling the desire to playact the story line.

I even read a piece by Sarane Rothberg, a teacher and multimedia consultant, who takes an educational spin on it. "…Teachers and students can jointly write and solve word problems using Pokémon situations or incorporate spelling words into Pokémon sentences. Students can work collaboratively on original Pokeman comic books, skits, game shows, or computer games in each subject area. Teachers can use student interest in card exchanging to launch into the history of trade and international commerce. Pokémon provides entrée into realistic dialogues on responsibility, honesty, trust and stealing…"

I applaud this teacher's ingenuity, but it didn't fly in our schools in the Dallas suburbs. The teachers are tired of having their classrooms disrupted by Pokémon mania. In fact, many schools in New York, New Jersey and Washington D.C. have also banned trading from their schools.

What do you think of the Pokémon craze? Am I just being paranoid? Should I just relax about the whole thing, or should I start a deprogramming center? Seriously, I would appreciate your feedback. I tried to find advice on the Web and searched for information about how to cope with children's fads, obsessions and so on-I found nothing at all. So, what's the answer? I hope to come to a conclusion soon-before the movie descends on our local theaters in November (my kids are already hyped up).