The following is the speech I gave at Keith’s funeral. For those who did not attend, I hope this website is still getting read. Tim Stivland

34 years, 6 months and 4 days. In that time, Keith gave and received more love than most do in their lifetime. And that’s what we can celebrate.

I met Keith attending a lecture. Well, it was kinda a lecture. Something to do with walking in single file out to recess. We were just turning 6 and going to kindergarten. We bonded instantly and have been best friends ever since. With 28 ½ years of memories, Jane and the Kammans thought I might be able to add something to this occasion, so I’ll try to do the honor justice.

Keith was very close to everyone in his family. I was over at the Kamman’s all the time when we were kids. The Kamman house was great to be around. Things we did as kids were playing around the pool, eating huge bowls of popcorn on the sectional could downstairs, watching TV, making jumps for bikes on the hill behind the house, playing street hockey. Keith was a tremendous athlete. He successfully played many sports over the years, but he loved hockey. He dedicated a lot of time to it, and he was good.

Keith had a great group of friends. Lifelong Friends. We took a lot of trips together - particularly Neal, John and I because we went on church trips all the time. We, Rich and others had countless camping trips like going to Sunken Lake.

I’ve been spending the last couple weeks trying to remember the stories I have about Keith. Everyday another dozen memories come back. But the first things I remember are not the events and the stories, but specific images of Keith. Singing along to a favorite song, like the Scorpions in 8th grade or the Cure 12th grade or Tina and the B-Sides in college; imitating a movie character like Cheech Marin (“waz hap-pen-ing”) or Bob McKensie (“beauty, eh”). I remember a giggling 13 year old in the middle of the sermon, trying to stop; the focused look of an athelete; laughing in appreciation of a good gag; several goofy expressions I couldn’t describe. I remember the look of contentment, love and adoration when he looked at Jane; the look of pride, joy and love when he picked up and kissed his girls. Mostly, his smiles are what come to mind. All kinds of them, generously dished out to all of us to enjoy and keep in our hearts forever.

Perhaps his most memorable trait was his humor. We all know that the Kammans all have a tremendous sense of humor.

Keith also had a pure and sincere sense of kindness. He cared for people. Really cared. This was complimented by his passive nature. He was so slow to anger. He didn’t seem to ever fight with anyone (although I’m sure Craig and Paula disagree with that!). He survived very well like this because everyone around him adored him so much. He was very lovable. He was so humble, though, that he diden’t know how much. Thanks to all of you, he did realize just how much he was loved this past year and a half.

All of these qualities lead him into being a great husband. Jane told me “We never fought”. Their caring and respect for each other, their deep love, and their kind nature produced a marriage we all admired.

I may have motivated the next phase of the family for Keith. I remember standing atop the parkinig lot at North Memorial Hospital smoking a cigar he bought for me in honor of my 1st child’s birth. He seemed to really connect with the joy of the experience. A year later, Claire was born. 2 ½ years later, Amelia was born.

Keith was an awesome father. I had a special opportunity to go on one last camping trip with him last August. He mostly about doing this with his family – both talking in future tense “I’m looking forward to the girls getting old enough for these trips” and other times saying things like “I can’t stand the thought of missing out.” It ripped his heart apart thinking about missing their special moments.

As Keith was cringing in pain at the very end, he said “I just love those girls.” He loved Jane so much, and he really wanted Claire and Amelia to remember him. That was really important.

Throughout his battle with cancer, he was such a fighter and so optimistic. He was inspiring – the way he handled himself; the way he focused on the best thing for his family; the way he stayed optimistic yet realistic; the way he fought to be around as long as he could for his daughters. The experience highlighted the strength of his character and the love he shared with his family.

If my job here today was to describe Keith for all of you, I could have saved the details and just said –

Keith was my best friend for almost 30 years, and he was simply the best man I have ever known.

We Morn

By Jim Kimble (Keith's Father-in-Law)

I need to start off with a concrete happening at the time when Keith had his 12 - hour surgery with the removal of the tumor on his cheek, removal of lymph nodes on one side of his neck and skin grafts. Joan and I visited him in intensive care and one could easily see the pain of the surgery ordeal. When it hurts you, you get a sense of his terrible pain, but Keith was so strong. We were there for a time and when leaving, I lightly placed my hand on his forehead, leaned close and said, Keith we are leaving now and will see you later. Then I was blown away by what happened. Through his terrible fog of pain, he said softly, “Thanks For Coming”. We didn’t need or expect a thank you for coming. We didn’t want him to use up any energy for a thank you. We wanted to be there for him and us. What this showed was, here is a person who in his extreme pain still felt the need to say thanks for coming. That folk’s was Keith, always thinking of others with such respect and sensitivity.

That is what the world needs and hungers for. He had that naturally in his character, soul and spirit.

We Morn – We Grieve - We Miss you Keith.

We wish as a society that we had the same intense emotion and commitment in fighting melanoma cancer that we showed in landing - people on the moon and returning them safely to earth. The fight against Melanoma cancer is the most difficult and you were very strong and inventive. We will forever have the wonderful memories of our times together in the many different places and settings. We will forever remember the wonderful companionship and fun that we had together. Keith your incredible strength, humility, courage and love are at the top and outstanding. We loved your sense of humor. You carried within you an open thoughtful mind, and a respect for all people and a respect for Mother Earth, our environment. We grieve the loss of a just, peaceful fantastic human being.

We grieve the loss of a good husband, a good father to Claire and Amelia. We grieve the loss of a wonderful friend. We grieve the lost potential. You possessed a great and noble outlook concerning our world and its people. You accomplished so much in so few years. We admire your creativity and sensitivity. Joan and I have met so many good people as a result of you being in our lives for this short time. The cards, letters, visits from friends the web site messages are a great testament to you, your character and that of your friends. As the saying goes, “you are a class act”.

Keith was an Architect and also an Architect of right relationships and also an Architect OF HOPE. When we mentioned what a blessing it was to have such wonderful friends. The response from his friends was, Keith was a blessing to us. With your passing the natural order of things are disturbed. Bad things do happen to good people, but in the end all shall be well. I would like to read a few lines from an article in the Episcopal Community Services Quarterly Newsletter. It is called “Architects of Hope” by Joel Gibson, who officiated the marriage of Jane and Keith and also baptized their daughter, Claire and later Amelia was also baptized here at St. Mark’s. Reading those few lines: “ I dreamt of some day becoming an architect. I loved envisioning homes full of Light and Life. I longed to create spaces where families could come together, where they could grow and play. I understood the importance of the feeling of home where children could feel safe and secure. I wanted to build those environments and leave a mark on the lives of people; one which would make a positive difference.” Keith was an Architect and an Architect of Hope and He made a positive difference in his too few, too short years. Keith stayed the course and stayed strong through this difficult painful ordeal. He did it with grace, courage and dignity.

Keith, son, brother, husband, friend your light shines brightly and valiantly. Keith expressed the Hope that his Daughters remember him. They Will, it would be impossible not to remember him. My father died when I was four and a half years old and I have some very dear memories of him. I remember and treasure those memories. They have also been a part of me, I’m 72 and they are still with me and so it will be with Claire and Amelia. Keith, we will all remember. It is impossible NOT to remember you. At Keith and Jane’s Wedding Reception, I sang or I should say I tried to sing, “An Affair to Remember”. I won’t sing it now, but feel compelled to READ a few of the lyrics: “ Our Love affair is a wonderous thing that we’ll rejoice in remembering. Our love affair was born with our first embrace and a page was torn out of time and space. Our Love Affair is a flame to burn through eternity.”

Keith, We Love You!

Memories of Keith

By Jane, Nancy, Jill and Sam Siebert

Hello. I am Keith's cousin, Nancy Siebert Murphy. I am going to tell you briefly about Keith's life, from a cousin's perspective, and from thoughts put together by my Dad and sisters Jane and Jill this week.

Keith was born in LaCrosse, Wisconsin, that lovely town on the Mississippi where his Mom Cathy was born, where his Mom and Dad, Paul, met, and where his Grandma McQuillen raised her six children. He was born in the summer of 1969, I remember it because I was eight and it was right after Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. Shortly after he was born, with older sister Paula, his family moved to New Hampshire where Paul had taken a job and where Craig was born. Keith started school there but moved back to the Midwest where he attended school in Plymouth.

There were 21 cousins on his Mom's side. As a cousin, my sisters and brother and I were older than Keith and Paula and Craig so my early memories of him are of a very cute little boy at our Grandma McQuillen's house and apartment in Lacrosse. My memories of him as a grownup are of weddings where he always seemed to be having an awfully good time with his male cousins. Last night, knowing I was going to share some thoughts on Keith today I asked Chicago cousin PJ just what they did at those weddings and, more specifically, how PJ, Peter, Keith and Craig became almost like four brothers in their teenage years. After about five stories of fishing trips, camping trips, and staying with each other in Chicago and Plymouth, I recognized a common theme: beer cans. So I didn't ask any more questions.

As far as I could tell from looking at all the photos displayed here last night, Keith was a true Minnesota boy. For all his urbane-ness, he loved fishing, bowling and camping with his friends and later with Jane and his spirited girls Claire and Amelia.

As I saw him grow up, we admired his emerging sense of style. We saw him pursue his education and career as an architect and I remember thinking some of his early projects were cool and contemporary. Keith built a deck at his parents' place using not-your-average Menard's lumber materials. And he built stone steps in front of our parents' house in Bloomington that pushed the design aesthetic of the neighborhood. Three weeks ago, my sister Jane and I found ourselves walking around Linden Hills where we stopped in on Keith's architecture firm. We saw some of the striking projects he was working on and met his colleagues who were as refreshing and creative as Keith was. His career reflected his values, I think. Keith and Jane bought a HUD house and believed in their South Minneapolis neighborhood.

Some more thoughts that I gathered from our cousins last night was just how sweet and nice Keith was. Paula said the guest book on his Web site carries this theme and has brought his whole family a lot of joy. Reading it, I was struck by the number of entries from high school girls who had crushes on Keith. I was also struck by his Great Gatsbyesque looks in the wedding photo that ran in his obituary on Friday.

In addition to his web of friends and career, without a doubt Keith's greatest accomplishment was his family. His wedding to Jane here in this cathedral seven years ago was not only great fun, but a day filled with such promise. Jane and Keith seemed to have everything going for them. And with the additions of Claire and Amelia, they had such a bright future.

This past year and a half has been unbelievable for all of us -- unbelievable in the aggressiveness of Keith's cancer that dropped like a bomb in the summer of 2002. I admired the way he researched his disease, sought the best treatments and tried everything. He fought it with determination. Just a few weeks ago as we visited him at his bedside, he said, "ahhh, we'll get through this."

Through his battle, we admired so much the love and support he got from his Mom and Dad, Paula and Craig, Jane's parents and sisters and his friends. Mostly, my sisters and Dad and I are so admiring of Jane. From the very beginning, Jane and Keith were in this together. She walked this difficult path with a quiet strength that never quit. She and Keith were sure to involve their girls in every step along the way and made sure they were loved. Right up until the end, Keith held on for them.

Paula says that Keith's ashes will be spread along the Mississippi, which defined much of his and Jane's life together. It is meaningful in that Keith was born in LaCrosse, fished at Itasca, went to school along the river at the University of Minnesota, and honeymooned in New Orleans where the river ends.

Life was short for Keith but it had purpose. We will see Claire go off to kindergarten in the fall, and Amelia will follow her. We will continue to gather as family. We will always pause to think of Keith and all that he gave us. He joins our Mom, his Aunt Lorraine, who died of the brutal cancer last May, his Grandma McQuillen, Grandpa Rudy and others in heaven.

Jane, we remembered this quote from Shakespeare about the stars for your love of the stars and the Minneapolis Planetarium and hope it gives some comfort:

And, when he shall die, Take him and cut him out in little stars, And he will make the face of heaven so fine That all the world will be in love with night And pay no worship to garish sun.

We love you Jane, and everyone. Thank you.