Parting Shot

Where's the Injuns what'll put arrers in yer back?
Where's yer slatherin' wolves of the rollin' prarie?
Where's yer grizzly brown bear as can claw the bark off a gum tree?

HERE'S A MAN for ya!  I'm half horse, half gator, tougher'n a earthquake.  I've got the prettiest gal, the fastest horse, and the ugliest dog this side of hell.  I can out jump, out run, throw down, drag out and whip any man in old Kaintuck.

I told my pap and mam I was comin' to the mountains to trap and be a mountain man.  Acted like they was gut shot! Sez, son, make your life here.  Here is where the people is.  Them mountains is for animals and savages.  I sez, Mother Gue, the Rocky Mountains is the marrow of the world.  By God, I was right!

I might never see 'em but my common sense tells me the Andes is foothills and th Alps is for children to climb.  These HERE is God's finest sculpturing.  There ain't no laws fer the braves ones.  Ain't no asylums fer the crazy ones.  There ain't no churches 'cepten this right here.  And there ain't no priests 'cepten the birds.  By God, I are a mountain man and I'll live til an arrer or a bullet finds me and then I'll turn inter a post and moulder into the further buildin' up of these here mountains, the back bone of the world.

Waugh!. 

paraphrased from Jeremiah Johnson, Warner Bros. Inc. 1972