From a recent letter to the Oakland Tribune:
"I was very touched to see [Jerry Brown] at the recent Vietnamese New Year Tet ceremony.... I am, however, equally disappointed that he wore a jogging sweatshirt to this sacred ceremony. Many of my compatriots also felt deeply hurt by his insensitivity and ignorance of our traditional values.... Brown could see the elderly with their most beautiful, traditional dresses and costumes to show their respect to the history and traditions.... So he could see our disappointment, seeing him in such casual clothing to this event."
And Jerry Brown, we recognized long ago that you operate in a different time-zone than everyone else on earth. Who has time to dress if you're running three hours late?
We have a solution to the dilemma.
We humbly suggest that the Mayor get a full-body tattoo of a business suit.
It can only be an improvement over what you wear currently, Jerry. We have not been impressed with the Italian suits, and your current tie-wearing makes you look like an accountant from Placentia.
What's your hesitation? Are you worried about our chilly weather? Fog? Shrinkage?
Pish-posh, we say. Suck it in, sailor!
Think of it -- if you're running late, you can just hop in the shower, towel off and zip into the Mayormobile, with no one the wiser that you're absolutely starkers. (Watch that leather interior, though. Ouch!)
A slate flannel three-button suit design would work, especially given the current hue of... ahem, how shall we put this?.... the wilderness of your Netherlands. Talk about your Gray Davis!
And with a clever application of greasepaint, you can darken your suit into a smart evening wear ensemble, for those socialite events 'cross the Bay with the Guster.
C'mon Jerry -- make the pubic public, and save some time in your busy schedule!