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Honesty, loyalty & courage.

True friends are found during times of adversity. They will never hurt you intentionally and will stand by you, no matter what. I am so fortunate to have the friends that I do. Treasure those who stand by you, discard the rest.

I helped out someone that I considered a close friend, in-fact I would have taken a bullet for him or anyone in his family, without hesitation. He was an unskilled individual, a handyman earning about $20K annually. To help him support his family of four (two sons, one of which is autistic and a neurotic wife), I convinced my bosses to hire him, stating that while he may lack experience, he was an individual of character and integrity. He then began making close to six figures annually and was quite successful at pulling the wool over everyone's eyes. As it turned out, I was and completely wrong about him. He was quite dishonest, a pathological liar and a thief (I hear his shed is filled with stolen electronic components). I could never even count on him to stand by me in any of the typical office political bull-shit, not even once, in-fact, just the opposite. I guess it's because he was such a supersized pussy, a real coward (I guess it's normal for a pussy to lack balls). He wasted no time stabbing me in the back or screwing me over just to make a buck, a true scum bag of biblical proportions as well as a professional bull-shitter. Now I understood why he never got along with anyone in his previous employments. He would always say some guy “had it out for him”. Now I understood the truth, others could seen him for the true trailer trash he really was, where I was too blind to see. Unfortunately this experience has changed me somewhat. I am no longer the same caring, giving or trusting person I once was and no longer believe there is goodness in everyone.

Sometimes you must do this alone in order to move on. You must forgive yourself and stop seeing yourself as a victim. See it for what it was, a part of life, a right of passage. There is no term for this kind of one-sided forgiveness. But if it does not occur, and you carry the burden of the remembered and unresolved betrayal with you, you remain in that relationship with your betrayer, even if you never see or speak to him or her again. Chances are, they have moved on and feel nothing on your behalf, while you remain bound in the betrayal and that makes you less than fully free to form a new relationship. So even if the relationship that was is now dead, you must do this in order to be fully free and open to another. Wish them no ill-will, instead, wish them nothing and move on. Be glad because you are now fortunate to be free from that one-sided bond. Chalk it up to experience, a lesson learned, life. Remember, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger!

Becoming a better human being each and every day. After adding all the positive and  negative things that we have done throughout our lives, the sum should be a positive number. If not, there is a lot of work to be done.