Fun in the suburbs

 

soon after the party began
Marvin insisted on modelling
some women's underwear
he bought in Los Angeles

Gunther could not be prevented
from exhibiting the results of
his failed sex-change operation

Chuck's half-brother from Waco,
released early for the holidays,
vomited all over the sofa

that hysterical bitch Sistina
played As my cunt gently weeps
sixteen times on her mad guitar

at midnight all the guys from
the office took off their shirts
and started slam-dancing
to Dead Kennedys tapes

without any warning Randolph
lost the use of both legs shortly
before his bladder failed

suffering from therapy withdrawal
Crazy Hernando drove Janet's
Honda into the swimming pool

Jennifer's brassiere is still
hanging from the chandelier
in the dining room

flaky patches of dried come
mixed with cocaine are visible
on the pool table in the basement

a half-crystallized trail of
slime and vomit runs all the way
up the staircase to the bathroom

the pet gerbil lies dead on the floor
of its cage for reasons no longer
determinable

Jacinth and Clovis emptied
the aquarium and took turns
microwaving the tropical fish

Tom's 12-year-old daughter
Cory was swiftly de-virginized
in the hallway closet

surprised by the cops, randy Ronald
and sluttish Sarah jumped naked
from the bedroom window

from her kneeling position
on the bathroom floor
Fat Emma bit one of the arresting
officers on the ankle

Rudy stunned everyone with
his sensitive impersonation
of Madonna masturbating
herself with a hand-mike

until the loudspeakers blew out,
cool sounds were provided by
the UK female punk band
Brenda Spasm and the Turdettes

after demonstrating some novel
techniques for sodomizing animals
Smitty experienced serious problems
extracting his virilia from
the tubular vacuum cleaner

Grandma Hawkins' recitation of
Nixon's 1974 resignation speech
was generally found amusing,
if pathologically obscene

in the living room
used condoms whorishly adorn
the sofa and lampshades

shitstains on the carpet
suggest the occurrence
of anal improprieties

a virulent alien life form
seems to have begun incubating
in the bathtub

but on the positive side,
it is possible that the blood
on the bathroom wall won't show
after two more coats of paint

 

 

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