Teen World - June 1970

Bobby Cries Bitter Tears

It was the worst day of his whole life. . .and Bobby knew he couldn't hide his awful hurt!

Bobby sat on the hard-backed chair and stared through the slats of the venetian blinds into the street.  It was daylight and people were walking on the sidewalk outside his window, going places, coming from places, being busy.  Bobby sat and stared at them, but he didn't really see anyone.  His mind wasn't on the people or the sun shining or the little spotted dog digging in a patch of grass.  His mind wasn't on anything but the terrible pain he was feeling.

It was a sad day for Bobby Sherman.  It was probably the saddest day he'd every known.  He was home alone on that beautiful day.  He was probably the only person home alone on that beautiful day in the whole city of Van Nuys, California.   At the very least, he was the only kid in his class who wasn't at the picnic!

Bobby had recently started Birmingham High School in Van Nuys.  As a treat, his class was having a sort of get-acquainted picnic.  Everyone was invited, even encouraged to come.  They could even bring dates if they wanted to.

For weeks, that was all the kids were talking about. . .the picnic, the picnic, the picnic.  Bobby had heard about it until it was coming out of his ears.   At first, he'd been excited about going.  He'd thought it was a good idea, a fun idea.  But as the time passed and the date of the picnic grew closer, Bobby wasn't so sure.  He didn't know if he wanted to go.  More important, he didn't know if he could go.

"It's not very well known", Bobby confided, "but I was very shy when I was younger.  I was more than very shy, in fact.  I was just about the shyest kid in California!"

Bobby knew what it was like to be lonely.  He'd never had any brothers or sisters to play with (his sister Darlene was quite a few years older than Bobby and although they were friends, they were never what you could call playmates).   When he was very little, there weren't many kids in his neighborhood he could be friendly with either.  So when he got older and started going to school, it wasn't easy for him to be friendly with kids he didn't know.

The difficulty continued as Bobby went through school.  By the time he was a teenager, it had turned into a real problem.  Bobby was definitely shy!   It was hard for him to talk to adults.  It was hard for him to talk to other kids his own age.  It was hard for him to talk to girls of any age.  Just about the only people he was comfortable with were his parents, his sister and a few others he'd known practically forever.

"Looking back on it now", Bobby said, "I guess my shyness really did me a lot of good.  Because I didn't have friends and places to go, I learned how to do things by myself.  I learned how to play more than ten musical instruments.  I taught myself electronics and photography and music and a lot of other things".  He smiled and his blue eyes twinkled.  "Maybe if I hadn't been so shy, I wouldn't be where I am today.  After all, I certainly got a lot accomplished home alone after school!"

One thing he did was build a replica of Disneyland to scale in his back yard.  Another was to learn how to produce 8mm sound Cinemascope and blow it up to ten feet in width.  Another was to learn how to play the trumpet, drums, French horn, trombone, guitar, harmonica and piano.  Another was to make his own records at home in his own studio.  And still another was to set up a closed circuit television camera with a special monitor so he could see himself as he was working.

"Most of the time, I was very happy by myself", Bobby said.   "I really didn't mind being alone because I kept myself busy doing things I was really interested in.  Making things with my hands, creating something out of nothing, was a challenge to me.  And I enjoyed working".

But most of the time isn't all of the time.  And no matter how pleased Bobby was with his accomplishments or how involved he got in his various projects, there were moments when the "being alone" would turn into "being lonely".

Parties would come and go.  School dances would be big successes.   Sporting events would draw big crowds.  But Bobby was hardly ever a part of them.  And it would be then - when everybody was doing something or being somewhere - that Bobby would feel the hurt.  And then he'd just sit quietly and wait for the hurt to go away.

It always did.  Somehow, sooner or later, it always passed and Bobby was happy again.  But he'll remember those days, the bitter tears he wanted to cry, the terrible ache of loneliness he felt in his heart forever.  And maybe that's why, today, he feels a special friendship for shy girls.  It's his way of making things a little easier for them than it was for him.