HUMOR IN LETTER'S 

TROJAN CONDOM COMPANY
6969 Slippery Root Drive
Droptrouser, NC 22269


Dear Sir,

We regret to inform you that we have rejected your application to
model and represent our product, Trojan Condoms.

Although your general appearance is not displeasing, our Board of
Directors feels that your wearing our product does not portray a 
positive, romantic image of our product. A loose, baggy and 
wrinkled condom is NOT considered romantic.

We did admire your efforts to firm it up by using Poly-Grip, 
but even then it slilpped off before we could get the photographs
taken. We would like to note, however, that we have never seen a
penis that looked like a bicycle grip until now.

We appreciate your interest and thank you for your time. We will 
retain your application for future consideration, if by chance we
decide that there is a market for Micro-Mini Condoms.

We send greetings and our deepest sympathy to your wife and or girlfriend.

Yours very truly,


Burly Dick, President
TROJAN CONDOM COMPANY

P.S. Remember our slogan!

Cover your stump before you hump..don't be silly, protect your 
willy..before you attack her, wrap your whacker..if you're not 
going to sack it, go home and whack it!!!