Sorry to inflict this on everyone, but I'm having a silliness attack.

Permission to archive to anyone.<g>

Thanks, Mike, for the inspiration.

Not That! Anything but That!
Copyright 1997

Natalie climbed the few stairs of her Parisian townhouse, exhausted. She hadn't thought it was possible for vampires to get so tired, but she was finding that there was something new to learn about her 'condition' with every passing day. She'd spent the evening making inquiries as to a possible future with the Parisian police department's forensics team, but hadn't been too successful. Though her French had improved greatly over the last several months, the French beauracracy was the model of government in all its glory - that is, it was slow, slow, slow.

She sighed and, turning her key in the front door, entered the foyer, only to find a basket with a stuffed and rather large white rabbit in it, along with some coloured straw and dyed eggs, sitting on the hall table. After placing her purse on the table and examining the basket, she turned and spotted another egg - this one was green - on the second to the last step near the bottom of the stairway. Gingerly, she picked it up and put it in the basket. She poked her head into the library - no Lacroix, though she felt him nearby - and spied a blue egg on the mantle of the fireplace. Since it looked as if this could turn into a rather long expedition, she picked up the basket from its resting place before walking over and retrieving the second egg.

This scenario continued for about 20 minutes as Nat found eggs - and more stuffed rabbits of all sizes and shapes - about the house. She even found one in the jacuzzi of the master bathroom, in what looked like a small boat, as the jets of water made it buzz about the perimeter. Removing boat and bunny from the jacuzzi, she took the latter and placed it on the bed with the rest of the items she had found, and realised she had a veritable mountain of eggs and bunnies. It was then, too, that she noticed Lacroix came into view and leaned against the doorframe.

"Having fun?" he asked, eyebrows raised.

"Yes, actually," Nat said, smiling, as she removed her jacket and tossed it over the settee which sat at the foot of the bed. "So. Easter's arrived."

"Not precisely."

For a moment, Natalie gaped at Lacroix, then the horror of his words struck her fully. "Oh, no! Not that! Anything but that! Puhleeeeeeze don't tell me this is another Roman holiday!"

"Alright. It's not another Roman holiday," he said. She could tell he was being honest.

"Thank *goodness*," she replied happily as she started picking up individual bunnies to examine them.

"Actually, it's a Babylonian holiday."

Nat rolled her eyes and threw herself, back first, into the pile of bunnies. "Somebody save me," she whimpered. "OK," she continued as she placed one hand over her forehead in expectation of a headache brought on by the destruction of another piece of her childhood, knowing there was no way she'd get out of the history lesson, "what's *this* one about?"

Lacroix walked over and sat on the settee and idly examined a bunny or two. "Well, it all started with the Chaldeans and the goddess, Beltis. One of her titles was Astarte or, if you examine some Assyrian monuments, Ishtar."

"And what was *her* purpose, may I ask?" Nat said in a long-suffering tone.

"She was a fertility goddess."

"Oh, not *another* fertility goddess!" Nat cried.

"'Fraid so," answered Lacroix.

"And let me guess: the Romans adopted the her."

"In a manner of speaking," Lacroix said, "though it might be more correct to say that we merely stole things and improved upon them. Mind you, at this particular moment I'm not sure if we stole it from the Babylonians or the Celts."

"There are those Celts again, always turning up when you least expect them," Natalie chimed in. "I can see I missed all the exciting stuff, what with being born in the 20th century and all." She really *did* feel a headache coming on.

"Yes, the Celts celebrated this day as the feast of Beltane - make sense?" asked Lacroix.

"Beltis, Beltane, whatever," she replied with a flourish of her hand.

"Astarte, Ishtar, Easter," Lacroix finished for her.

"So we've got another fertility festival on our hands," Natalie said as a matter of fact.

"Quite so."

Nat contemplated the canopy over the bed for some minutes before she sat up and began arranging bunnies according to size, then removing all the eggs to the basket which she had also placed on the settee. After the last egg had gone into the basket, Lacroix grasped her hand and raised it to his lips.

Natalie sat down next to him and drew her legs up under her. It was difficult to stay upset with someone who was so good at seducing you. They sat in silence for several minutes before Natalie finally spoke.

"Hey," she began, "do you suppose some things are more possible on certain days than others?" He knew what she was referring to.

"Not unless you believe in miracles," Lacroix said wrily.

"Still," Natalie continued, "in the interest of science..."

"In the interest of science," Lacroix continued for her, "I suppose we should really put it to the test."

"Absolutely," replied Nat. "We really do have a moral obligation, I think."

"Quite right."

"I mean, to the entire Community...You never know, do you?" she asked as she covered his mouth with her own.

"No, my dear," he told her when they came up for air, "you never know," and drew her closer to him.

Any comments??? Please send all, including Cadbury's Creme Eggs to: KnightGal@aol.com