More Stories About the Differences Between Men & Women...
More Stories About the Differences Between Men & Women...
- He said... Want a quickie?
- She said...As opposed to what?
- He said... I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
- She said...You wear briefs, don't you?
- He said... Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
- She said...Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.
- He said... "This coffee isn't fit for a pig!"
- She said..."No problem, I'll get you some that is."
- She said...What do you mean by coming home half drunk?
- He said... It's not my fault...I ran out of money.
- He said... Since I first laid eyes on you, I've wanted to make love to you in the worst way.
- She said...Well, you succeeded.
- Priest... 'I don't think you will ever find another man like your late husband.'
- She said...'Who's gonna look?'
- He said... You have a flat chest and need to shave your legs, have you ever been mistaken for a man?
- She said...No, have you?
- He said... Why do you women always try to impress us with your looks, not with your brains?
- She said...Because there is a bigger chance that a man is a moron than he is blind.
- He said... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
- She said...Turn sideways and look in the mirror.
- He said... Let's go out and have some fun tonight.
- She said...Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.
- He said... Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
- She said...I would, but you're never there.
Confession
A priest is hearing confessions and opens the little window. A man's voice says, " Father, I'm 72 years old, been married to the same woman for 50 years, never once cheated on her, but last nite I made love to two 18-yr old twins."
The priest says, "My son, that is very serious. When was your last confession?"
Man: "Never Father, I'm not Catholic."
Priest: "So what are you telling me for????"
Man: "I'm telling everybody!"
Mom's have Mother's Day - Father's have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
------- Palm Sunday!
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