- Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '98:
- Wear sun screen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sun screen would be it. The long-term benefits of sun screen have been proved by
scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.
- Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.
Oh,never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
- Don't worry about the future.
Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blind side you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.
- Do one thing every day that scares you.
- Sing.
- Don't be reckless with other people's hearts.
Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
- Floss.
- Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself.
- Remember compliments you receive. Forget the
insults.
If you succeed in doing this, let me know how you did it!
- Keep your old love letters. Throw away your
old bank statements.
- Stretch.
- Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you
want to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year olds I know, still don't.
- Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees. You will miss them when they're gone.
- Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe
you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce
at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding
anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or
berate yourself either.
Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.
- Enjoy your body.
Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you will ever own.
- Dance.
Even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.
Read the directions.
Even if you don't follow them.
Do not read beauty magazines.
They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents.
You never know when they'll be gone for
good.
- Be nice to your siblings.
They're your best link to your past to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go.
But with a precious few you should hold
on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyles.
Because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew
you when you were young.
- Live in New York City once.
But leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once.
But leave before it makes you soft.
- Travel.
- Accept certain inalienable truths:
Prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old.
And when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young,
prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children
respected their elders.
Respect Your Elders.
- Don't expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund or a wealthy spouse.
But you never know when one might run out.
- Don't mess too much with your hair.
By the time you're 40 it will look 85.
- And in closing....
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.
- But trust me on the sunscreen.
