Friday, October 22, 1473
7:00 a.m.
Florence, Italy
MARTY agreed to spend the night with the Vespucci’s as they had guest arrangements set for him. In the morning he woke up and saw a female resembling his mother come in.
“Mom, Mom?” he asked, “Is that you?”
“There, there. Just relax. You’ve been asleep since last night.”
“I had the worst nightmare, Mom. I dreamt that there were two Jennifers and one of them was naked. And they wanted to get into a catfight with each other. It was terrible.”
“Well, you’re safe and sound now. Back in the Vespucci household.”
“Vespucci household?”
At that, Marty’s eyes popped wide open. Looking around, remembered that he and Jennifer did travel back in time to Renaissance Italy. A candle was lit and there stood the woman of whom he was talking too. She did look a lot like his mother but more Italian than otherwise.
“Why,” exclaimed Marty, “You must be…who are you?”
“Cynthia DeNardi.” said the woman.
“Cynthia DeNardi?” repeated Marty. If I ever get back to the future. I’m gonna look up my genealogy on my old lady’s side of the family. This is nuts.
“Are you hungry?” asked Cynthia, “My master said you haven’t eaten since dinnertime last night.”
“What do you got to offer?” asked Marty, “Ham and eggs?”
“No.” said Cynthia, “But I’m not the cook. I’m only…”
“Cynthia.”
Turning around, there was Marco Vespucci.
“My master.” said Cynthia, “Good morning.”
“Go get your mistress up.” he ordered.
Cynthia bowed and left.
As she did, the male servants entered to dress Marty.
“Hey guys.” he said, “I know how to tie my own shoes.”
“But you are an honored guest, Alexander.” said Marco, “I must insist.”
“Okay.” said Marty, “You’re the host.”
++++++
Jennifer had a hard time getting up. Realizing that she never drank so much wine before, being the fact that she lived in a time and a place where one had to be twenty-one to drink, the prince had to have handmaidens help her out of bed and into a cold bath.
As she was soaking herself in there, there was a knock at the door. The woman who was bathing her, went to the door.
“It’s the prince.” she said.
“I’m not decent.” said Jennifer covering her top part.
The woman talked to the man on the other side of the door. Then, turning to Jennifer, she said “He’ll wait outside. He says he wants to take you to breakfast.”
“That’s good.” said Jennifer, “I hope he takes me to a Starbucks. After last night, I need a cup of coffee.”
“Starbucks?” asked the woman bathing Jennifer, “Coffee?”
“Yes.” said Jennifer, “Starbucks Coffee. Haven’t you ever…Oh yeah.
I forgot.”
“Forgot what?” asked the woman.
“Never mind.” said Jennifer, “I hope he takes me to a Lyon’s Inn.”
The woman gave Jennifer a peculiar stare.
++++++
After breakfast, Marco took Marty out the archery range for some target practice. At this point in time, the bow and arrow gave way to the crossbow. Marco demonstrated to Marty how it works by shooting at a few targets. Then, it was Marty’s turn. He made several shots at the target making a lot of bull’s eyes. Marco was impressed.
“Where did you learn to shoot like that?” he asked.
“At a 7-Eleven.” said Marty.
Marco’s eyes popped wide open at this.
++++++
Jennifer finally realized that there was no such thing as coffee in this era. After breakfast, the prince said “Simonetta. Can I ask you a question?”
Jennifer sat upright and said “Yes?”
The prince got up from his chair, picked up a cushion and went over to kneel in front of her saying “Will you marry me?”
Jennifer froze at this question. It’s been nearly a week since she broke up with Marty. To get involved with another romantic entanglement too soon was thoughtless. Then, she realized that the soon that she would completely cut herself off from Marty the better.
So she asked “When would the wedding be?”
The prince looked at her. “Well, this Saturday is out of the question because of the festival. How about next Saturday?”
“Next Saturday?” asked Jennifer.
She knew that if she didn’t get back with Marty by next Thursday, she and him would spend another week in this century. And if they don’t fall back in love again then, another week and so on.
Doctor Brown can keep jumping from week to week until the DeLorean runs out of gas. I’m not going back to Marty. And if Marty has to spend the rest of his life here in the 15th century as well, that’s his problem. said Jennifer to herself. So she said with a smile “Yes.”
The prince kissed her hand and said “You shall be my princess and the princess of Florence.”
“I like that.” said Jennifer. Putting their arms around each other, they started to kiss.
++++++
After target practice, Marty was taking a bath. He sat in there saying to himself I guess they haven’t invented the shower yet.
Then, Cynthia came in.
Marty looked at her exclaiming “Hey, don’t you ever knock?”
“I’m here to wash you.” said Cynthia.
“Like hell you are. Get the hell outta here. I’m a man.”
But then, more women came in with soaps, washcloths and towels.
Marty sat there embarrassed.
++++++
After the bath, he came into the study. Marco sat there with his wife Simonetta.
“Marco.” he protested, “I don’t want women coming in to help me with the bath. Especially when I’m naked.”
Marco and Simonetta looked at each other then looked at Marty laughingly.
“Why are you so embarrassed about that, Alexander?” asked Marco, “The ladies bathe me and my wife doesn’t mind.”
Marty looked at Simonetta who smiled. “Listen,” he said, “I’m not much on your tradition but where I come from there’s such a thing as modesty.”
“You are a strange one indeed, Alexander.” mused Simonetta, “This idea and obsession over privacy. I have a feeling that you were born a priest.”
Marty paused. Then, he said “I had some lessons.”
++++++
Speaking of priests, Jennifer went with the prince to the Cupola of Duomo to meet the bishop about a wedding. Jennifer only saw the exterior in pictures but now she got the chance to see it close up. She marveled at the sight of such huge building. When she entered, the exterior was intoxicating. The ceiling so many stories high that if she looked down from there, the congregation would look like the size of ants. The pews, the walls and the alter bore those of in a cathedral.
Then, the bishop came out to greet the couple and invited them into his office.
Sitting down, the prince started by saying “We would like to get married next Saturday.”
The bishop turned to Jennifer and asked “Is this alright with you?”
“It is.” said Jennifer
Turning to the prince, the bishop said “Your Highness, can I have a word with you?”
“Of course.” said the prince, “Simonetta. Can you excuse us a minute?”
“Sure.” said Jennifer. She got up and left the room.
++++++
Once, Simonetta was gone, the bishop told the prince “Don’t you know who that is?”
“Yes.” said the prince, “Simonetta…”
“…Vespucci.” said the bishop, “She’s already married. I can’t
marry her to you. It would be adulterous.”
“This Simonetta is not the Simonetta who’s married to Marco Vespucci.” said the prince, “This is a different Simonetta.”
“How did you arrive at that conclusion?”
“When I escorted Simonetta Vespucci to Botticelli’s studio yesterday, I discovered another Simonetta posing for him.” said the prince, “I don’t know where she came from, but from what she told me, she came off another relationship with another lover.”
“You said, you saw that other Simonetta Botticelli’s studio posing for him.” said the bishop, “Was she wearing any clothes?”
The prince stuttered at this for a moment. Then, said “Just say I walked in on them when she, well how can I put this?”
“Well, there was no harm done.” said the bishop, “And since she is not the real Simonetta…”
“She is real to me.” insisted the prince, “And full of surprises.”
“I’ll bet she is.” said the bishop, “Alright, the wedding will take place next Saturday.”
“Thank you, father.” said the prince.
“And your Majesty,” said the bishop, “If you did see her with her clothes off, say an Our Father and three Hail Mary’s and tell God that you’re sorry.”
“Will do.” said the prince.
++++++
The prince emerged from the bishop’s office saying “Next Saturday, you will be my wife.”
Jennifer’s face lit up with a smile. She put her arms around the prince saying is “I’m so happy.”
She was kissing the prince when he said “Take it easy. We must make plans for next Saturday but I’ll save the news for tomorrow at the festival.”
“Of course.” said Jennifer.
They left the church, but there was joy in Jennifer’s heart.
++++++
Meanwhile, Marty was having a tough time adjusting to the 15th century. At one point, he asked “Hey do you know where the bathroom is in this joint?”
“What’s a bathroom?” asked a servant.
“You know.” said Marty, “Toilets.”
The servant gave Marty a peculiar stare.
“Well shit, how does one take a dump in this…”
“Oh shit.” said the servant, “Use the window.”
He escorted Marty to the back where there was an open window. Marty could smell an odor. Taking a look outside, he felt sick to his stomach.
Then, he said “Where can I find the toilet paper?”
“What’s a toilet paper?” asked the servant.
“Something you use to wipe your ass after taking a dump.” said Marty.
The servant stood there speechless.
So Marty asked “Well, what the hell do you use?”
“Your hands.” said the servant.
“I know I have to use my hands to hold something when I…oh shit!” Marty felt a little sick. Before using the window, he asked “Can you at least give me something to read while I’m, you know.”
“Like what?” asked the servant.
“A magazine.” said Marty, “Or a newspaper.”
“What’s a magazine?” asked the servant, “And what’s a newspaper?”
“Oh yeah.” said Marty, “You haven’t heard of ‘em. They don’t
exist yet.”
“Anything else?” asked the servant.
“That’s it.” said Marty, “Close the door when you leave.”
The servant turned and left.
Marty sat on the window sill and as he did, he heard some whistles and a sound of an old lady saying “Hello sonny.”
Marty turned around to look and saw a group of women standing across the street the street ogling him. “This is heavy.” he said as he put his head on his hand.
++++++
Jennifer finally arrived at the studio after she and the prince visited the bishop. She was all smiles when she entered.
“Simonetta.” said Botticelli, “You look so happy. What happened?”
“You’ll find out tomorrow.” said Jennifer.
“Ah the prince have a surprise, eh?” said Botticelli.
“You could say that.” said Jennifer.
Then, she looked in the general direction of the clamshell. The two models were ready to be mounted on the pulley as soon as Jennifer got ready to stand on the clamshell but the broom lady was not in her work clothes. Instead, she was wearing this flowing gown and was barefoot just as the woman who posed as the hours in the painting was.
“When I saw my broom lady covered you yesterday,” explained Botticelli, “it sort of gave me an idea for the painting. So now she is the hours.”
“I see.” said Jennifer, “Now if you could excuse me, I would like to get ready for my pose.”
“By all means.” said Botticelli.
Going into the changing room, Jennifer removed her clothing and stood naked in front of a mirror. She was admiring the body that by next Saturday night will be admired by a prince.