THERE'S ALWAYS HOPE...
(I HOPE...)

loneliness is a place
at the end of the rope
loneliness is a place
  where there's no hope...


the pendulum swings
to polar extremes
in time the heart strings
play all the dreams
from the highest highs
to the lowest lows
the pendulum swings
even when nobody knows

but the garden will grow
the river will flow
  and the wind will blow...
even when I'm the last to know


sometimes I feel so lonely
in a room that seems full of love
sometimes I feel I'm the only one
dreaming the dream I dream of
sometimes I feel so afraid
that no one will ever understand
and all the plans I once made
might just be like grains of sand
sliding through some vast hourglass
dissolving in space and time
not taking shape, just to pass
into illusions of the sublime
what is the point, does anyone know?
is life a dream or a crime?
is destiny guided like a river's flow?
or as random as two words that rhyme?
and what's the difference if nobody knows
if nobody shares, who cares?
sometimes I wonder why a garden grows
even when it seems no one's there
and what's the difference what or how my heart shows
if no one is here
who is here?


a message for anyone listening
please don't buy into the fear
it's just momentary illusion
that brings on this deep despair
I appreciate reassurance
but hope is not all gone for good
so please don't believe the sounds of desperation
even when you think I wish you would
even when I seem to beg
please don't encourage self-pity
even when I seem on my last leg
even when I sound worse than shitty
please believe somewhere deep inside me
I know better - I haven't died - or give up yet
so please don't think I don't remember
even when I seem to forget

the pendulum swings
to polar extremes
in time the heart strings
play all the dreams
from the highest highs
to the lowest lows
the pendulum swings
even when nobody knows

but the garden will grow
the river will flow
  and the wind will blow...
even when I'm the last to know


sometimes I feel so lonely
I wonder if the pain shows
even though I know - it's all illusion
I still can feel all the blows
I know I create my own experience
and my feelings depend on the perspective I choose
but knowing does not seem to help me
when life just seems to say - "you lose"
and the next song might say dream on
and all hope is never all gone
but when I can't seem to find it
there's just no getting behind it
and when I can't seem to find me
there's just no way to remind me
who cares?
who shares?
who's been here?
who is there?


you can save all your words of wisdom
when I'm this deep in private despair
self-pity won't let me hear you
no matter how much you might care
nothing will make me believe you
even when I beg you to share
the best you can do is just hold me
until I work through my own fear
so please don't beseech me
  cuz nothing can reach me...
  and nothing can teach me...
  when I'm here...

loneliness is a place
without shape or form
where fires that burn me
can not keep me warm

loneliness is a time
with no start or end
and no explaination
and no love you send
can enter this place
so let's not pretend
you can help me now
whatever you send
when there's no hope
there's no friend

loneliness is a place
at the end of the rope
loneliness is a place
  where there's no hope...


the pendulum swings
to polar extremes
in time the heart strings
play all the dreams
from the highest highs
to the lowest lows
the pendulum swings
even when nobody knows

but the garden will grow
the river will flow
  and the wind will blow...
even when I'm the last to know


The Pendulum of Loneliness

Ric Candor    ©1998