Dogoholism

• Does your dog wear Calvin Kanine sweaters and Poochi boots, while you buy your clothes from the Salvation Army budget shop?

• Does your mother refer to your four-legged dependents as her grandchildren, even though you have no human children?

• Is your monthly dog supplies bill higher than your house payment?

• Can you discuss pooper-scooper tools and worm medicines while having dinner without losing you appetite?

• Is your house equipped with a doggy doorbell, installed at paw height, so your dog can let you know when it wants inside?

• Do you receive a "preferred customer" discount at your veterinarian's office?

• Do you fix your dog's breakfast before you own? Does your pooch have its own table place mat?

• Do you know exactly what your dog(so) say when they bark?

• Do you own a motor home for the exclusive purpose of being able to take your dogs on vacation with you (the size of being proportional to the number of dogs it can hold)?

• Does your dog go into the bathroom with you?

• Did you pay to have your dog's bed monogrammed  instead of replacing the holey sheets on your bed that bears puppy's "this was fun to chew" signature?

• Do you sleep on the couch when your dog pushes you off your king-sized mattress so you don't disturb it?

• Do your neighbors think of you as that "dog person"?

• Have you ever run out of bread, milk, and toilet paper but had enough dog food and biscuits to last through a seven-year famine?

• Do you start a Christmas Club account for you dog when you buy your annual dog license?

• Is your favorite pastime browsing through travel books and planning trips to scenic parks where you can walk your dog?

Susan Davey
Floppy Dog House

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Five Bassets are better than one