Those who've read the reviews section know that I'm not fond of Sang for the Birds, but as I was paging through it a while ago in search of quotations-of-the-week, I noted that the book, which I had not previously cared to return to after my first disappointing read-through, contained heaps of prime "Brrr Power" fodder. The fruits of that discovery appear below. The words are a little more obscure this time around...
1. Argh, maintaining a romantic relationship in Pickax can be a pain for two folks who'd just like a little privacy. "'All of Pickax knows I've been doing Polly's grocery shopping,'" gripes Qwilleran, "'even though I've been slinking around like a footpad.'" We get your complaint, Qwill, but perhaps not your terminology - what's a "footpad"?
a) a manservant
b) a soft-shoe dancer
c) a cat burglar
d) a highwayman
2. Qwill & Arch's conversation turns to landscaping. Qwill starts talking about his personal yardwork projects - "in that wide, open space beyond the bird garden, Kevin Doone is putting in a meadow of native grasses, wildflowers, and forbs." Arch, of course, asks what "forbs" are. "To tell the truth, I'm not sure. It's some kind of plant. My dictionary is vague about forbs, but I trust Kevin." Surely it would take a world-class gargantua of a word to stump proud childhood spelling champ and known lexiphile Qwill, and, to tell the truth, our dictionaries were a little vague on the word's meaning too. But would you nevertheless care to take your own best stab at what (approximately) a "forb" is?
a) a low-lying, dull-colored ground plant of (of course) Scottish origin
b) a broad-leafed herb
c) a type of plant which boasts large, feathery fronds
d) "Synthetic! Probably carcinogenic!"
3. Dialogue from the Art Center - "People prefer exotics, like the Paris Peacock and the Red Lacewing....A lot of people make collections, specializing in Blues or Swallowtails or Hairstreaks." About what is the speaker...er...speaking?
a) birds
b) butterflies
c) fly-fishing lures
d) hand-crafted armchairs
4. More fun with Polly - Qwill commissions artist Paul Skumble to create a oil painting of his ladylove, but Polly returns from the sittings bursting with effluent praise about the suspiciously suave artist, declaring that she'll need to use the time she and Qwill usually spend together during the weekends to keep her appointments with Paul. "Why did I ever suggest this fandango?" the jilted grocery-fetcher rues - which is to say that he now considers his once-brilliant Polly portrait plan -
a) a hopeless quagmire
b) an ill-considered caprice
c) an expensive mistake
d) Nonsense. Just plain nonsense.
5. The precocious Culvert McBee makes his first appearance in Sang for the Birds. Qwilleran is taken a bit off-guard when the young fellow first introduces himself, since it's not often you meet a boy named after -
a) a drainage pipe that goes under a road
b) one of those ovalish patches of dirt or gravel by the side of a country road that enables cars to turn around and go the other way
c) a small dell
d) a minor piece of farming equipment that aids in the threshing of grain
6. Our own Ronald Frobnitz, that lucky guy, wins an intaglio artwork of a snowflake entitled The Whiteness of White from a raffle up at the Art Center. Since the piece is an intaglio, which of the following ways could the image of the snowflake have been created?
a) The artist composed the image from smaller scraps of material affixed to the paper.
b) The "negative space" of the image was cut away from the paper, leaving only the lace-like snowflake intact.
c) The image was recessed into the paper via the printing process.
d) The artist created a large snowflake stamp by carving the image in relief into the top of a wooden block, applying pale inks to the block, and then stamping it onto the paper.
7. Qwilleran attends Maude Coggin's outdoor funeral; the first fellow who catches his eye is a "solemn man wearing a surplice". At whom is Qwilleran looking?
a) The pastor. Who else's presence would be so prominent at a funeral?
b) Andrew Brodie, all set to pipe for the ceremony
c) an Art Center volunteer paying his respects in the facility's traditional blue smock
d) one of the local law-enforcement officials called in to keep the peace at the packed ceremony
8. Not content with scoring a thousand-dollar intaglio, Qwill lets Susan Exbridge talk him into buying a several thousand-dollar "very old Italian compass with an interesting provenance". For several thousand dollars, this compass'd better have a heck of a lot of provenance. What is so remarkable about this compass, anyway?
a) Its origins. Its background. You know, as in it's Italian and very old.
b) the needle on the compass which, when not in the presence of psychic, telekinetic felines, points north
c) the tarnish on the metal case that the appraisers on Antiques Roadshow are always telling you will take away 3/4 of the value of your item if you polish it off
d) some special added feature, like GPS tracking or a little rotating picture of the sun, moon, and stars going by
9. Qwill is out shopping again for Polly (or, rather, going to stores and asking the merchants to shop for him) and visits Elizabeth's Magic. Lizzie has a gift idea - "She likes caftans, and I have a lovely handwoven cotton in saffron". Qwill, of course, asks her to "wrap it up", probably not caring exactly what it is as long as it's an acceptable gift. What did Qwill end up getting her?
a) a length of cloth wrapped about the head to form a turban
b) a long piece of cloth that folds over the body to create a sari-like garment
c) a long, loose, sleeved, tunic-like garment
d) a short, wide-sleeved silken jacket with embroidery on the hems
10. The Hams win the pennant! The Hams win the pennant! The Pickax Theatre Club's team of orthographers wins the Spell Game with the word "vicissitude". Like most spelling bee champs, though, they probably have no idea what the heck the winning word they spelled means. Do you?
a) the height of a drop or fall
b) a change in state or condition
c) malice, nastiness
d) shininess, scintillation
Bonus! In keeping with the spirit of the Spell Game, can you tell which of the following words is mispelled?
paroxysm
lassitude
knowledgeable
mnemonics
sieve
vichyssoise
The heck with the answers, back to the C-pad index.
Back to the Ronald Frobnitz and Family index.
No answers, just the C-pad index.
Back to the Ronald Frobnitz and Family index.