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If you want to search for anything sent in the last couple of years, read some jokes, or see what the weather is like here, try the web site:
<a href=" http://home.att.net/~martysjokes/index.html "> Joke Site</a>
You can even check out any Amber Alerts.
If you want to subscribe or unsubscribe etc. easily, just see the "housekeeping" section at the bottom of this message before the sig.
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Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having
a fight at the breakfast table.
There seems to be someone out there with way too much time on their hands.
banana grammar dresser potato revive uneven assess
Answer:
What it took to get an 8th grade education in 1895
Remember when grandparents and great-grandparents stated that they only had an 8th grade education? Well, check this out. Could any of us have passed the 8th grade in 1895?
This is the eighth-grade final exam from 1895 in Salina, Kansas, USA. It was taken from the original document on file at the Smokey Valley Genealogical Society and Library in Salina, KS, and reprinted by the Salina Journal.
8th Grade Final Exam:
1. Give nine rules for the use of capital letters.
2. Name the parts of speech and define those that have no modifications.
3. Define verse, stanza and paragraph
4. What are the principal parts of a verb? Give principal parts of "lie", "play", and "run."
5. Define case; illustrate each case.
6. What is punctuation? Give rules for principal marks of punctuation.
7 - 10. Write a composition of about 150 words and show therein that you understand the practical use of the rules of grammar.
1. Name and define the Fundamental Rules of Arithmetic.
2. A wagon box is 2 ft. deep, 10 feet long, and 3 ft. wide. How many bushels of wheat will it hold?
3. If a load of wheat weighs 3942 lbs., what is it worth at 50cts/bushel, deducting 1050 lbs. for tare?
4. District No 33 has a valuation of $35,000. What is the necessary levy to carry on a school seven months at $50 per month, and have $104 for incidentals?
5. Find the cost of 6720 lbs. coal at $6.00 per ton.
6. Find the interest of $512.60 for 8 months and 18 days at 7 percent.
7. What is the cost of 40 boards 12 inches wide and 16 ft. long at $20 per meter?
8. Find bank discount on $300 for 90 days (no grace) at 10 percent.
9. What is the cost of a square farm at $15 per acre, the distance of which is 640 rods?
10. Write a Bank Check, a Promissory Note, and a Receipt
1. Give the epochs into which U.S. History is divided
2. Give an account of the discovery of America by Columbus.
3. Relate the causes and results of the Revolutionary War.
4. Show the territorial growth of the United States.
5. Tell what you can of the history of Kansas.
6. Describe three of the most prominent battles of the Rebellion.
7. Who were the following: Morse, Whitney, Fulton, Bell, Lincoln, Penn, and Howe?
8. Name events connected with the following dates: 1607, 1620, 1800, 1849, and 1865.
Orthography (Time, one hour) (Do we even know what this is???)
1. What is meant by the following: alphabet, phonetic, orthography, etymology, and syllabication.
2. What are elementary sounds? How classified?
3. What are the following, and give examples of each: trigraph, sub vocal, diphthong, cognate letters, and lingual.
4. Give four substitutes for caret 'u.' (HUH?)
5. Give two rules for spelling words with final 'e.' Name two exceptions under each rule.
6. Give two uses of silent letters in spelling. Illustrate each.
7. Define the following prefixes and use in connection with a word: bi-, dis-, mis-, pre-, semi-, post-, non-, inter-, mono-, and sup-.
8. Mark diacritically and divide into syllables the following, and name the sign that indicates the sound: card, ball, mercy, sir, odd, cell, rise, blood, fare, last.
9. Use the following correctly in sentences: cite, site, sight, fane, fain, feign, vane, vain, vein, raze, raise, rays.
10. Write 10 words frequently mispronounced and indicate pronunciation by use of diacritical marks and by syllabication.
Geography (Time, one hour)
1 What is climate? Upon what does climate depend?
2. How do you account for the extremes of climate in Kansas?
3. Of what use are rivers? Of what use is the ocean?
4. Describe the mountains of North America
5. Name and describe the following: Monrovia, Odessa, Denver, Manitoba, Hecla, Yukon, St. Helena, Juan Fernandez, Aspinwall and Orinoco.
6. Name and locate the principal trade centers of the U.S.
7. Name all the republics of: Europe and give the capital of each.
8. Why is the Atlantic Coast colder than the Pacific in the same latitude?
9. Describe the process by which the water of the ocean returns to the sources of rivers.
10. Describe the movements of the earth. Give the inclination of the earth.
Husband
gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and
storms out of the house.
After
sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings
her up.
She
comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says,
"what took you so long to answer the phone?"
She
says, "I was in bed."
"In
bed this early, doing what?"
"Getting
a second opinion".
-------------------------------------------------------------
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From Jack
There seems to be someone out there with way too much time on their hands.
I am only sending this
to my smart friends. (Then how come you sent this to me? Harry)
See If You Can Figure
Out What These Words Have In Common......
banana grammar dresser potato revive uneven assess
Are You Peeking Or
Have You Already Given Up?
Give It Another
Try....
You'll kick yourself
when you discover the answer.
Go back and look at
them again; think hard. OK...
Here You Go.. Hope You
Didn't Cheat. This Is Cool.
Answer:
In all of the words
listed, if you take the first letter, place it at the end of the word,
and then spell the word backwards, it will be the same word.
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From
Liz
Can
any of us pass this test? Now I understand how my Grandmother
became a teacher after only 8 years of school and no college.
Liz
Liz
What it took to get an 8th grade education in 1895
Remember when grandparents and great-grandparents stated that they only had an 8th grade education? Well, check this out. Could any of us have passed the 8th grade in 1895?
This is the eighth-grade final exam from 1895 in Salina, Kansas, USA. It was taken from the original document on file at the Smokey Valley Genealogical Society and Library in Salina, KS, and reprinted by the Salina Journal.
8th Grade Final Exam:
Salina, KS, 1895
Grammar (Time, one hour)
1. Give nine rules for the use of capital letters.
2. Name the parts of speech and define those that have no modifications.
3. Define verse, stanza and paragraph
4. What are the principal parts of a verb? Give principal parts of "lie", "play", and "run."
5. Define case; illustrate each case.
6. What is punctuation? Give rules for principal marks of punctuation.
7 - 10. Write a composition of about 150 words and show therein that you understand the practical use of the rules of grammar.
Arithmetic (Time, 65 minutes)
1. Name and define the Fundamental Rules of Arithmetic.
2. A wagon box is 2 ft. deep, 10 feet long, and 3 ft. wide. How many bushels of wheat will it hold?
3. If a load of wheat weighs 3942 lbs., what is it worth at 50cts/bushel, deducting 1050 lbs. for tare?
4. District No 33 has a valuation of $35,000. What is the necessary levy to carry on a school seven months at $50 per month, and have $104 for incidentals?
5. Find the cost of 6720 lbs. coal at $6.00 per ton.
6. Find the interest of $512.60 for 8 months and 18 days at 7 percent.
7. What is the cost of 40 boards 12 inches wide and 16 ft. long at $20 per meter?
8. Find bank discount on $300 for 90 days (no grace) at 10 percent.
9. What is the cost of a square farm at $15 per acre, the distance of which is 640 rods?
10. Write a Bank Check, a Promissory Note, and a Receipt
U.S. History (Time, 45 minutes)
1. Give the epochs into which U.S. History is divided
2. Give an account of the discovery of America by Columbus.
3. Relate the causes and results of the Revolutionary War.
4. Show the territorial growth of the United States.
5. Tell what you can of the history of Kansas.
6. Describe three of the most prominent battles of the Rebellion.
7. Who were the following: Morse, Whitney, Fulton, Bell, Lincoln, Penn, and Howe?
8. Name events connected with the following dates: 1607, 1620, 1800, 1849, and 1865.
Orthography (Time, one hour) (Do we even know what this is???)
1. What is meant by the following: alphabet, phonetic, orthography, etymology, and syllabication.
2. What are elementary sounds? How classified?
3. What are the following, and give examples of each: trigraph, sub vocal, diphthong, cognate letters, and lingual.
4. Give four substitutes for caret 'u.' (HUH?)
5. Give two rules for spelling words with final 'e.' Name two exceptions under each rule.
6. Give two uses of silent letters in spelling. Illustrate each.
7. Define the following prefixes and use in connection with a word: bi-, dis-, mis-, pre-, semi-, post-, non-, inter-, mono-, and sup-.
8. Mark diacritically and divide into syllables the following, and name the sign that indicates the sound: card, ball, mercy, sir, odd, cell, rise, blood, fare, last.
9. Use the following correctly in sentences: cite, site, sight, fane, fain, feign, vane, vain, vein, raze, raise, rays.
10. Write 10 words frequently mispronounced and indicate pronunciation by use of diacritical marks and by syllabication.
Geography (Time, one hour)
1 What is climate? Upon what does climate depend?
2. How do you account for the extremes of climate in Kansas?
3. Of what use are rivers? Of what use is the ocean?
4. Describe the mountains of North America
5. Name and describe the following: Monrovia, Odessa, Denver, Manitoba, Hecla, Yukon, St. Helena, Juan Fernandez, Aspinwall and Orinoco.
6. Name and locate the principal trade centers of the U.S.
7. Name all the republics of: Europe and give the capital of each.
8. Why is the Atlantic Coast colder than the Pacific in the same latitude?
9. Describe the process by which the water of the ocean returns to the sources of rivers.
10. Describe the movements of the earth. Give the inclination of the earth.
Notice that the exam took FIVE HOURS
to complete. Gives the saying "he only had an 8th grade education" a
whole new meaning, doesn't it? This also shows you how poor our
education system has become... and, NO! I don't have the answers, and I
failed the 8th grade test!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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There
is a story about a certain bookmaker who was making a long trip by car
when towards nightfall he happened upon an inn which had a most unusual
name, The Even Steven. Since it was located in the middle of a
desolate stretch of country, and he didn't know how much farther the
next place would be, he decided to stop there for the night, and
satisfy his curiosity about the name at the same time.
"It's
very simple, really," the proprietor explained. "You see, my name
is Steven Even. So I just decided to turn it around and call this The
Even Steven. I thought if might get a few folks puzzled enough to
stop and ask questions, and sometimes it does."
"That's
a pretty smart way to use the luck of a name," said the bookie
appreciatively. "I bet it brings you a lot of business."
"It
hasn't brought me so much luck," he said. "The folks who stop
here don't stay long. There's not much gaiety around here, as you
could see. In fact, there's not another soul lives closer than
thirty miles away, whichever way you go. Makes it pretty lonely
for me, a widower. And worse still for my daughters. Three of the
loveliest girls you ever set eyes on, should have their pick of boy
friends. But, they are getting so frustrated they're about do
anything for a man."
The
bookie made sympathetic noises, and listened to more in the same vein
until hunger obliged him to change the subject to that of food.
An excellent home-cooked dinner was served to him by a gorgeous blonde
who introduced herself as Blanche Even; and when he was finished she
still kept pressing him to ask for anything else he wanted.
Finally, she said, "Would you like me to sit and talk to you for a
while?"
"Thank
you," he said politely, "but I've had a long day and I feel like
closing the book."
He
went to his room and had just started to undress when there was a knock
at the door and an absolutely breath-taking brunette came in.
"I'm Carmen Even," she said. "I just wanted to see if you'd got
everything you want."
"I
think so, thank you," he said pleasantly. "I do a lot of traveling, so
I pack very systematically."
When
he had finally convinced her and got rid of her, he climbed in between
the sheets and was preparing to read himself to sleep over the Racing
Form when the door opened again to admit an utterly gorgeous redhead in
a negligee to end all negligees. "I'm Ginger Even," she
announced. "I wanted to be sure your bed was comfortable."
"It
is," he assured her.
"I
hope you're not just being tactful," she insisted. May I try it
myself?"
"If
you must," said the bookie primly. "I will get out while you do it."
When
she had gone, he settled down with a sigh of relief and was about to
put out the light at last when the door burst open once more and the
proprietor himself stomped in, glowing with indignation. "What's
the matter with you," he roared. "I got to listen all night to my
daughters moaning an' wailing, the most luscious gals in this county,
because they all try to show you hospitality an' you won't give one of
'em a tumble. Ain't us Evens good enough for you?"
"I'm
sorry," said the transient. "But I told you when I registered I'm a
professional bookmaker. ... I only lay Odds."
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OK, move along, that's all there is,
move along please ....
-----------------------------------------------
Housekeeping:
While I write some of what appears in my newsletters, mostly it is
stuff that's
merely passed on, often without attribution. If at all possible,
attribution is
given, and any copyright notice, if copyrighted material is used at
all,
is ALWAYS included. Written permission(s) (email-I can't
handwrite) are
sought where practicable. If you see anything at all that shouldn't be
there,
should be differently attributed, or is objectionable in any way,
please let me
know by simply writing
to me . In no event is any income derived, and so the following
notice is
included:
*COPYRIGHT NOTICE** In accordance with Title 17 U. S. C. Section 107,
any
copyrighted work in this message is distributed under fair use without
profit
or payment..
[Ref. Fair
Use
]
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-------------------------------------------------------
"Experience
is a great advantage. The problem is that when you get the experience,
you're too damned old to do anything about it."
- Jimmy Conners
Home is where the grab bars are.