MAKE A NOTE!! -- May 31st, 1997

CIRCULATION 49

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RESPONSES TO REQUESTS...

GORILLA BAR RECIPE

For those of you who don't know the history, this recipe was prepared by a mess hall and was VERY good. When we asked for the recipe we received one for 200 portions (2- 18"x26"pans), I'm not too bright sometimes. :-) But we feel that we have been able to quarter the recipe for a 9x13 pan and it seems to turn out pretty well. So here it is.

2 1/2 sticks butter (or margarine)

3C Flour

2C brown sugar

1C semi-sweet chocolate chips

1tsp vanilla

1C chopped pecans (or walnuts)

Cream butter, then add sugar & cream again, add vanilla & cream again. Switching to a large spoon (unless you have a heavy duty mixer) add flour gradually & stir to mix. Stir in chips and nuts. Mixture will be a bit crumbly. Press FIRMLY into ungreased 9x13 pan. Bake until lightly browned, about 20 min at 350 degrees. Cut while warm, but don't remove from pan until cool. Makes about 4 doz small bars, very rich, so don't cut too big.

PASTA BAKE

This wasn't a request, but a friend sent me this recipe which is very easy, but I haven't seen the family go this crazy over something in a long time, seconds all around. So here it is..

1 lb ground beef

1 jar (30 oz) spaghetti sauce

1/2C parmesan cheese

5C cooked pasta (we used bow ties)

1pkg (8 oz) shredded mozzarella cheese

small can mushrooms (optional)

Brown ground beef, drain, then rinse in colander under hot water to get rid of an additional 50% more fat. Stir in spag sauce, parmesan and cooked pasta, & mushrooms if desired. Spoon into 9x13 pan. Top with mozzarella. Bake at 375 for 20 min. By the way, you can rinse all ground beef like that in other recipes too. POST RECIPES....in your recipe boxes.

FLEAS & DOGS

Someone had asked for ways to control fleas with dogs naturally. I haven't tried it, but I have heard that using lemon juice on your dogs fur helps and/or giving your dog whole garlic (but I wouldn't get too close to his face after the latter). Also throwing a flea collar into your vacuum bag is a good idea to kill any fleas that are vacuumed up. Vacuuming daily is one of the best way to control fleas inside. Some people have success with the flea collars and I have been informed that there is a new pill they can take to repel fleas and also a drop that goes between their shoulders that also works well. POST IT...with dog care products.

CHILD TRAINING

Someone else has asked me to put out some good ideas on child-training (I prefer this phrase to childrearing), but that is really asking me to tread into dangerous waters considering my oldest is only 8. So running the risk of starting a flame war (for those of you not into internet terms, this means something that generates a lot of heated email and postings), I will try to tell you a few of the things that work for us. BUT remember there are no perfect children and it is a lot easier to know WHAT to do than to consistently DO it. Believe me, I AM an expert in THAT (inconsistency).

1. Be Consistent - This will solve probably 90% of your child training problems. Most of the time when I have been lax, I have seen an improvement even in one day of being consistent. That may mean dropping everything else & having TV dinners that night, but things need to be addressed immediately. But it is also a good idea to warn the kids that you are doing it. Be honest with them and explain that they have been misbehaving, tell them how, and that you were not being as diligent in addressing the issue as you should have and that things are going to change now. I do this several times a year. We all forget sometimes to be consistent. Just remember the more consistent you are the less problems will need to be dealt with.

2. Limit TV time- there was a study showing that more than 2 hours of TV a day with kids, no matter what they were watching seemed to cause a corresponding drop in IQ scores. So we limit our kids to 2 hours. We give them 24 cards that are each worth 5 minutes of watching at the start of the day. When they want to watch something, they clear it with us and "pay" us the cards needed for the show. Some days they use them all up(esp. if they are used to watching a lot), some days they don't watch at all. If your child is used to watching a lot, then at first they will be bored and drive you crazy with whining, but after a day or two they will start to play with their toys more and find other interests. Several friends have been through this too. they also seem to be calmer when they aren't watching a lot of TV. This system will also teach them discipline in budgeting their cards, by saving them for particular shows. They cannot pool cards with other kids, if they are watching they pay with their cards, even if someone else picked the show. We also count computer and video game time, anything where they are watching the screen. Once the cards are gone, they are gone, tell the kids that they were the ones who used the cards and will have to wait until the next day for more. Also let's face it people, here are certain shows that cause kids to want to fight and be rowdy, or have nightmares, so if you let your kids watch them, then you have to accept the consequences.

3. Limit sugar and caffeine intake.-You won't know what a difference this can make until you get them cut back or off the stuff. Also some artificial colors and flavors can cause kids to act "hyper", I speak from experience, we've had problems with vitamins like that.

4. Get them plenty of physical exercise- I noticed a tremendous improvement in Sean's behavior and attention levels when we started him in TaeKwonDo classes and others mentioned it to me also. It doesn't mean they are always "good", but it does help. And don't just assume they get enough activity in school.

5. Give them the Blessing-the blessing is from a book called, "The Gift of the Blessing" by John Trent & Gary Smalley. It is basically 5 parts:

1. Tell the child you love them,

2. Tell them that they are the only 5-yr-old girl(or whatever) that you would choose to be your child,

3. Tell them that God has a special plan for their lives,

4. Tell them that you will be there if they need you.,

5. Cuddle, kiss, and hug them while you are telling them these things. We try to do this first thing in the morning and just before bedtime at night and the kids just glow, even after they have heard it before. And by the way, The Blessing doesn't have to be limited to kids, it can also be a great way to remind others how much we love them too.

6. Parents should give themselves a Quiet Time in the morning-On the days when I drag my body out of bed before the kids get up and take time to pray and read the Bible, those days just go so much better. I have a better day and the kids do too. It does make a difference. And get enough sleep too!

7. Read and use good resources- Here are a few...

Dare to Discipline by James Dobson

The Strong-Willed Child by James Dobson (his books available from 1-800-A-Family)

Hints on Child Training by Trumbull (Elisabeth Elliot's grandfather)

For Instruction in Righteousness -has chapters on problem areas, along with Bible verses on what the Bible says about the problem, Bible stories that illustrate the sin or corresponding positive character trait, and recommended verses to have the kids memorize, recommended punishment to fit the crime, and recommended rewards for the opposite of the sin. For example, it may talk about laziness and give the verse that talks about a lazy man being like a weed, and so you might have the child pull up weeds as punishment and to think about how he is acting. I like it because it has the verses in the book, so you don't have to do as much jumping around when looking up verses.

Brother-Offended Chart- Has a booklet and nice chart for the fridge that teaches kids how to handle disagreements Biblically (log in own eye, one on one, then two on one, then parent) and also how to handle it once they admit they have sinned( ask God for forgiveness, then the other person, then try to make it right). The chart has cartoons, so that is helpful even for non-readers. Now when my children come to me, I ask them if they have done their part yet of the chart. It cuts down quite a bit on the amount of time parents have to intervene. Also have a coin & timer handy that they can use to decide whose turn it is or give them timed turns.

Stewardship Street- Teaches money management by breaking down their allowance into different savings envelopes. Our kids have star charts for chores and the more they do (even the ones they are expected to do every day), the more stars they get and the more money they get for their allowance. I know it is in vogue these days to give them an allowance for nothing to show they are loved (that's what the Blessing is for), I respectfully disagree. The Bible says if you don't work, you don't eat. I don't want them to grow up and think that if they have a job, but don't do the work, then they should still expect to get paid. By the way, Trumbull's book is an excellent eye opener about what we teach our children with every day decisions. for example, do you let your kids get up & down from the dinner table at home? If so, don't be surprised if they do it in a restaurant, they won't see the difference like you do. The LAST THREE books are only available from Doorposts, P. O. Box 1610, #372, Clackamas, OR 97015. However, they are also on the internet, do a search for the Doorposts web site and you should come up with the titles of

the books.

The Bible- number one selling parenting and life directing guide.

POST THESE....on your shopping list or in plain sight. :-)

Well it looks like I have used up this newsletter with parenting things. Hope our single readers will forgive me for being one-sided in this issue.

REQUESTS

Let me know if there are any other subjects you would like to see covered. Make-A-Note@worldnet.att.net

COMING ATTRACTIONS IN FUTURE ISSUES

Tracts, travel tips, accoutability, Christmas (yes, Christmas) the easy way.

JOKE

There were 2 friends walking their dogs, a doberman and a chihuahua. They owner of the dobie wanted to go into a restaurant, but the owner of the chihuahua pointed out that they couldn't with the dogs. The dobie owner said, "Follow my lead" and put on dark glasses & went into the restaurant. The manager tried to stop him, but the dobie owner said that the dobie was a seeing eye dog. The manager said, "A dobie?" and the owner said that sometimes they were. So he let him in. Then the owner of the chihuahua shrugged his shoulders, put on dark glasses and tried to go in. The manager stopped him and he told the manager it was his seeing eye dog. The manager said, "A chihuahua?!" and the owner said, "They gave me a chihuahua!?!"

QUOTE

"HALF this game is NINETY percent mental."

--Philadelphia Phillies manager Danny Ozark (Think about it :-)

Remember, I am NOT a child care expert nor do I have perfect kids, I only know what HELPS with our kids. No flames please.

God Bless, Sharon

^i^

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